Silk & Steel (Spellbound #3)

Chapter 8: Headache

Cas stared at the pile of papers on his desk, ignoring the pounding headache that threatened to incapacitate him. They had started after the events in Highglaive and were worse after suffering from nightmares. Nightmares that were more frequent after Isobel's arrival at Fort Mael. He scowled as he tried to read the latest report from Boreas's spies in Dreadlands. The words kept floating around the page, making it an arduous task.

Grabbing the little sword-shaped letter opener, he used it to trace the lines, but it helped little. In a burst of frustrated anger, he threw the letter opener across the room, just as the door opened and Isobel stepped inside. The small sword nearly hit her, but she knocked it away with a wave of her hand. It clattered to the floor in a corner, and they both stood frozen for a moment, staring at each other in shock.

Isobel swayed on her feet for a moment, breaking Cas out of his petrification.

"By the Gods!" he exclaimed. "Forgive me."

When she didn't immediately move or say anything, guilt washed over him, and he came around the desk to take her in his arms before he remembered himself and his steps faltered. "Are you all right?"

She nodded, but still wouldn't move. He hesitated, uncertain if he ought to go to her. The pain behind his eyes increased as the pounding in his head continued its relentless assault.

Finally, she took a few steps into the tower, and after giving the letter opener a quizzical look, she met his gaze. She flashed him a wry smile. "You know, if you want me to leave you alone, you need only say so. No need to throw things at me."

Letting out a self-deprecating laugh, despite it hurting, he was glad to see she was fine. "I'm truly sorry," he said, leaning back against the desk and crossing his arms over his chest. "I never meant to attack you with flying objects."

"It should teach me to knock louder." She grinned before coming closer. "I wanted to come by and thank you for helping me when I first arrived. I would have done it sooner, but I've barely seen you since I moved to my own quarters."

There might have been a slight note of admonishment in her voice. If there was, he couldn't blame her. After he had assaulted her with that kiss, he had avoided her as much as possible, throwing himself into training with the troops every day until he fell into bed exhausted every evening. It was better that she was away from him. He didn't even know where her new quarters were located. Which was a conscious choice because he didn't trust his resolve where she was concerned.

When a wave of pain made him wince, her eyes grew worried and her eyebrows knotted. "How are you? Is something wrong?"

"It's only a headache. Nothing I can't handle. It happens sometimes after the nightmares."

"Do you have nightmares often? I have my fair share," she admitted with a wry smile. "What are yours about? Mine are usually about the Siege of Messina or the time I spent on the road trying to avoid Deva's followers."

"My time in Highglaive." He hadn't planned to tell her, but it slipped out before he could stop himself, and her head jerked up to stare at him.

"You mean—"

"After the Dark Disciple conquered the city." He didn't want to talk about it and wasn't sure why he was. Maybe because the blinding pain and nausea distracted him.

Isobel looked at him, her eyes searching his, but he looked away. "I know terrible things happened to everyone in Highglaive," she said slowly. "But I didn't know you were one of them, and I don't know what happened to you specifically."

"The same as everyone else, I imagine." He certainly wasn't about to tell her that they used his infatuation with her to torture him. To make him believe she had arrived to save him, only to take the sweet solace away. Whittling away at his hope and sanity one chip at a time. Those times had been worse than the physical punishments. The lack of food and water. He rubbed his forehead with his fingertips, closing his eyes for a moment.