DISCONTINUED || the deputy and the lawyer || DISCONTINUED

the chapter

I ran towards his cave, furious, not even bothering to mention that I was visiting.

"Fwhip!? Where are you?!"

"Leader! Oh hi! What are you doing here?! Oh look at this look at my outfit i put on my badge! It's beautiful, I'm never gonna take it off!"

He proudly held his deputy badge up, I could tell it was recently polished by the way it glistened in the light from his windows

he then started jabbering about the badge, that i now am starting to regret giving him

"Ooh and the man in the cage is still here! Yeah I've been feeding him pork chops so he doesn't die. Are you proud of me?! Ooh he's gonna love your jail once we get him ther-"

I cut him off "Fwhip, i need your help"

"Oh yes of course leader! What do you need help with?! Ooh it's gonna be so fun to help you! I can't wait-"

"Fwhip i need you to pretend to be my lawyer"

"What?"

"i need you to pretend to be my lawyer"

He sounded surprised, I don't blame him. I'd be surprised if anyone came up and asked me to pretend to be a lawyer, let alone my idol!

"Oh um, of course! Yeah I can do that for you!"

"Great. I left some clothes for you in your room, change into them will you?"

"Oh yay! I love new clothes! Oh but can I wear my badge over the top?! I don't wanna take it off ever!"

"No you can't, it's a disguise."

"A disguise?!"

God this man

"Just change already"

"Yes leader!"

He hurried off to his house to get changed, finally. While he was changing I decided to take a look at his empire.

His house wasn't special but quite comforting to look at, having small two towers either side and a little living room in between them. The warm colours paired with the greenery make it look less like a house and more like a home.

I started down the path towards my "home away from home" which is just a little cabin upon one of the cliffs in his cave, though it's not much that thing makes me smile. It's nice to be wanted, not criminally of course! I'm the sheriff for goodness sake!

Just then Fwhip ran out his door onto the path behind me

"Sir, I'm done! Ooh I love it! Did you make this yourself?! It's so pretty! I look so smart! Do you think i look smar-"

"You look very smart, now come with me we need to "file" a lawsuit"

"Ooh yes yes! Who are we suing sir?!"

"Joel"

"Joel?! Like, like Joel the god?!"

"Precisely"

"If you say so sir"

I could hear his tone change, a once happy excited goblin now had visible goosebumps. I hoped he still wanted to take part in the suing.

"Great, now where do you keep your anvils?"

"Um up by my tavern sir"

"Wonderful. Do you have a pen?"

"Yes"

We spent the next 30 minutes heading up the road towards his tavern, it should have only taken us a few minutes but he insisted on telling me the backstory of every single building along the road side.

"Were here sir! Isn't it beautiful!"

"Very, now write what i say on these papers"

"Got it!"

He snatched the papers out of my hand and pulled his pen out from his back pocket, well it was actually just a stick that had a hole knocked through the middle and filled with charcoal, but it'd do.

"Dear god joel, I am suing you for copyright infringement"

"Ok, ok um sir, how do I spell infringement?"

"I n f r i n g e m e n t"

"Thank you sir!"

This man is an idiot, why did I make him deputy again?

"Ok now write "you are being sued" got it?"

"Yup! I'm gonna make a lot of these! He's gonna be in so much trouble!!"

At Least he's excited about this once more

"Ok anything else you think we should write Fwhip?"

"Are you asking me?!"

"Yes?"

"Ooh thank you thank you sir! Um can we write "you got served"? Please sir!"

"Sure, I don't see why not."

"Eek! Thank you sir!"

He spent the next 20 minutes making copies of the lawsuit so he could, actually I'm not quite sure why he made so many copies. Oh well that's Fwhip for ya.

Whilst he was making copies I had time to look around his cave empire, "Gobland" was it?

I walked down the road from his tavern, admiring the greenery, well it was crops not greenery but it still livened up the place. There was a pathway that led up, through a mountain, I think it was the one I entered through. It seemed as if it was floating for Fwhip is excellent at hiding structural supports.

I trekked up the path a little before stopping. Once about a third of the way up I turned around and sat down on one of the steps. Gobland looked beautiful from up here, not that it didn't look beautiful from the paths below!

There were multiple small crop and flower fields all around the empire, almost all the flowers were red. Sugarcane lined the paths, giving them a start and end. A bridge linked both sides of a ravine, on the other side of it was the townhouses and tavern.

No two townhouses were the same yet they all fit together perfectly, some had sandstone walls whilst others had oak or spruce, heck one was made out of endstone!

The roofings were no more similar then the walls with some being blue, some orange and some a deep red.

I was quite jealous of it If I'm being honest, I'm not really a builder. But Fwhip most certainly is. Maybe I could hire him to build something in Tumbletown. Having a townhall would be nice, and I'm certain I wouldn't need to pay him, he'd be ecstatic that he even got to build there.

and i gave up here

bye bye