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As you guys can see this song was inspired by the song " I'm not the Only One " by Sam Smith. A really good song. Please listen to the lyrics when you listen to the song so that you can see where this tiny book comes from. Hope you enjoy it. ###############################
When I opened my eyes, I immediately knew you weren't there. Not because I didn't feel you, but because you were one to leave me in bed to wake up all by myself. It was a Saturday morning yet, you had woken up and left me at 6:00 am. I remember you mumbling to me in my sleep. Probably using the fact that you told me where you were going to in my sleep,to later on yell at me for being nosey when I ask where you went without at least telling me about it. You told me that you were supposed to be going to "work". I knew that you were lying to me right away. You had never needed to start work on a Saturday morning. Especially if it involved being up so early in the day. But here you were up and about, getting ready to leave me. Just to see your very young and good looking mistress. I knew you had started a thing with her a few years ago and as much as it hurt, I just couldn't force myself to confront you about it. I got up from the now empty bed and made myself go downstairs into the kitchen where I found you tying your tie. Getting ready for her. You were putting so much effort in the way you were dressing and in the way your hair looked. And in that moment I felt like crying. It had been a really long time that you had actually tried to look good for me. I remember when we were newlyweds,you had always made sure you looked good before you even let me look at you. You would always blush and say that you didn't want me to re-think our marriage.
But now I feel like you wouldn't even care if you hadn't showered as long as I didn't touch you because you knew that she would have found out in some way. And that wouldn't have been good for you....or me. Because then she would of gotten mad at you. Then you would start putting me down because you didn't know were to release your anger BUT with me. "Hey, " I said, walking up to you hoping to get at least a peck from you . But like always,you had to move away from me before I could reach you. Leaving me to drown in my self pity. "Don't be nasty Sophia I bet that you haven't brushed your teeth yet, so excuse me, I have to go, " you said pushing me to the side in order to go out the door. I had to push the very strong feeling of hurt aside and give you a fake smile that you would of been able to decipher six years ago.
After you left I started thinking of the things that you were going to do with her.I didn't want to think about that, but I couldn't help it and I just hated myself for that. I went running upstairs to the room left of ours where we kept all of our happy moments in pictures, where I had bottles and bottles of alcohol. You would of known that if you still cared enough to re-live our memories. I started drowning in alcohol and started feeling the rage I have been accumulating for five years now since you started having your affairs with her.
I jumped up in the spur of the moment and went to our room. I started grabbing all of your clothes and just started ripping them,letting out all of my anger. After I finished with all of your shirts I let myself fall to the ground and sob out all of my pain. I just couldn't stop the deep feeling of sadness within me. I knew that you would never change. Nothing that I say could change your way of living. I wanted so much for you to stop, but I knew that if I mentioned her you would get mad at me and tell me that I was crazy and making everything up. That my jealous ways were making me blind to the truth.
So after I had calm down I put everything in its place and cooked dinner. And just waited for you to come back to me. Because even if you went to her for sex. You will always come back to me because I was the woman that you liked to present to others. And in a sort of messed up way... I know that you love me. ***************************************** There you go hope you liked it. And please don't forget to vote and comment. {To let me know if you liked it otherwise I'm just gonna think that you hated this:(}
