Fascination

pretending

*the bell rang*

with only 1 more week left in my junior year I was more stressed than I had ever been. I had been going through a lot and I just couldn't seem to concentrate.

I walked to my locker, put my phone on the shelf and headed to homeroom.

" wow Jo, you really look lovely today" my friend hope laughed from across the room.

"there is no one to impress and im tired" I laughed even though I was lying. I wanted to impress shawn but there was no chance. So I just gave up.

"shawn mendes" mr smith repeated
"doesn't anyone ever know where that boy is?" he yelled

everyone laughed as his realization that even though it was finals week shawn still wouldn't be coming in early.

"shawn mendes, please report to the main office as soon as announcements are over"

as soon as homeroom was over i went to the library and logged on to twitter. hundreds of dms all about the same thing "im sorry to bother you but I was wondering if you would be available to help me study for the exams, xoxo"

i logged off and sat in my usual seat next to the door. at 11:30 I noticed shawn slamming the door of the library wide open.he looked amazing, he was wearing adias pants, a grey hoodie and black vans. he was holding a red lanyard with his keys that he was carelessly swinging around.

"woah" he smirked as he almost hit me in the eye. I looked up and then went back to reading my book. "the... aftertaste" he stuttered while grabbing the book out of my lap. " shawn, stop why don't you just go study?" he threw the book back on my lap and laughed

"Jo maybe you could ..... help me study, I need to pass these exams or I can't go play hockey this summer" he smiled, trying to persuade me.

" I'm sorry I can't" I lied trying to seem as nice as possible. his eyes filled with disappoint which honesty made me upset. I did like shawn very much, he was one of the only popular guys who was nice to everyone. shawn had an imagine though, and I knew that if I tutored him a lot of people would start saying things he wouldn't want to hear.

"why not" he whined as he playfully knocked his feet against mine. "I'm already helping stela". i wasn't lying, there were so many people I was helping, but that isn't why I didn't want to help him. "thanks anyway" he walked away still swinging his keys.

I couldn't stop myself from watching him as he walked over to Angela. he took her hand and guided her back to there usual stop in the library. I could see him perfectly but from his angle he couldn't see me at all. he grabbed Angela's waist and pulled her in for a kiss, just like he did everyday. she giggled and the librarian told them to be quiet, just like she did everyday. I sat in my chair pretending to read a book that I had no interest in, just like I did everyday.