Tears of Blood

Heartless

I wake up. It's Saturday, 10:22 AM. I yawn. I don't feel like getting up. I feel as if I haven't slept all night. I get undressed and take a shower. The cool water on my body feels so nice in this raging heat. I get dressed in a blue tanktop with a flower on the right chest-side and black tights. As I'm getting dressed I smell breakfast, yum. It's bacon and eggs. Dad made it. He's been making this for breakfast every day ever since mom died. It's usual to expect a plate with strips of bacon and eggs toppled all over it. We sit in the kitchen in silence and stare at our food for like all eternity until finally I dig in. "Jasmine-", dad starts. "No!", I begin to yell at him, "I don't want to hear it! I'm tired of you sulking and repeating to me the same thing everyday. 'Oh mom would've done this better and mom would've done that better.' I'm tired of it! Mom is dead so get over it." I run out of the kitchen to my room. I yell into my pillow; tears streaming down my face. I remember that day clearly. Dad was at work all night, so why should he sulk. He didn't witness anything. Poor mom. She looked as if she was thrown on the floor; thrown on the floor like a rag doll. It was all a bloody mess. That scream she gave before her last moments, Blood curling. What makes me cry more is the fact that earlier that day, I had a tantrum because I had a bad day that day so I stormed into the house yelling that I hated her because she had joked with me a little. She was only trying to make me feel better and I blew her off I now want her bad. I want to tell her my feelings, and tell her about school (a living hell). But I remember my feelings revolve around her occurred death. I cry like theres no tomorrow. I Just lay there on the bed like a baby. I wish I was a baby again. A lifeless and needing fetus. So I could have a reason to have mom back. I count up all the times I said I hated her and each time I say, "I love you". Flashback. "I love you." Flashback. " Please come back! Mom, I miss you!