a million different things I could have done that day

Chapter 4

Krystelle

I let Carson go after a while. It wasn't his fault my family was so messed up. He didn't leave though; he stayed for hours after, helping us clean up. At one point, after he was able to get rid of the guests, dad decided to grace us with his presence. He walked up with a smile and said, "Hey, there. Are you a friend of Krystelle's?"

And so it began: Carson charming dad, and dad laughing at every syllable that popped out of his mouth. Despite my excessive protests, a friend of mine had pulled me aside, disabling any chance I had of hearing their conversation. Wow, I thought looking at dad beaming at him. Don't get me wrong, I knew Carson's sense of humor was uproarious, but this was Dad. He was a lively person, but I hadn't seen that man laugh so mirthfully in my life. I'd gotten some of the comedian genes, but not enough to make dad laugh the way he was right now, talking to Carson.

Mom was lounging on the mahogany couch in our living room when I finally got home. With her caramel brown hair, and greyish-blue eyes, she looked like me. With her mature posture and vibe of superiority, she looked picturesque even in jeans and a T-shirt.

"Katia's having a baby," she said without looking up from her laptop. The woman was probably perusing through a report right now. "The shower's in at the end of this month."

I threw my purse down. "Mother, I don't understand why you expect me to be friends with these girls. I am clearly of a higher caliber than these morons who can't keep their knees shut. And why are we celebrating the birth of a child Katia clearly despises?"

"Are you nearly done?" she asked with her signature sigh.

I crossed my arms, "Yes, but-"

"Krystelle, there is no but. She's your cousin and best friend."

"No, she is your best friend's spoilt daughter, who was once my best friend. She probably had too many drinks one night and is now pregnant at eighteen. You people can keep pretending that she got married because she loves Matthew, but you are not fooling anyone. We all know Beth refused to let her daughter get an abortion. So now, Katia had to drop out of college and marry that ape of a man."

Moms eyes flared with rage. "Krystelle, I am being patient with you. I am being patient with you because you are my daughter and I love you. But believe me, if you keep behaving like this-"

"You are being patient with me because you don't want people to know that you are a controlling egoist." And then l walked out.

I sat in my room at my study desk for an hour after, studying and listening to music, anything really.

This was a "family rule" as dad loved to call it. It went like this: every time someone walked out in the middle of an argument, everyone would wait an hour before following up. This would give everyone an hour to cool off and think rationally. You can't blame dad; it worked on almost all days. Today was just not one of them.

Mom walked in a minute late. I say a minute late specifically because for her even that was off-key. "What's wrong with you, honey? Is this because you're spending too much time with your father? Is he influencing you?"

My voice rose as I spun my seat around, "Oh, for heaven's sake, mother! The one time l say something to you, anything, you blame dad. Have you ever considered that it's you? That I don't like the way you think I should live my life? Have you ever, just for a moment, considered another person's opinion?"

"I let you attend high school," she exclaimed. At this point we were both screaming.

"Only because dad called joint custody.''

"Honey, l don't have time for you right now."

I whispered, "You never do." And then there was silence. I could tell by now there were tears in my eyes. "If I'm such a burden," I continue, "then send me to dad's. Heaven knows that's what you've always wanted; it is more efficient."

"Krystelle, you are not a burden. But you are a child. You don't understand that this is how family works. We support each other. If your mother asks you to do something, you do it even if you don't want to, and you do it with a smile."

I wanted to scream that that wasn't my point, but reluctantly, l nodded.