The Last We Fell

20. 𝔗𝔥𝔢 𝔏𝔞𝔰𝔱 𝔚𝔞𝔯𝔫𝔦𝔫𝔤

I listen to the clock that's mounted on the wall of the dining room as it ticks away. Fighting off exhaustion, I had settled at the table to finish my drafted exam so I can send it back in time. The pendants that hung from the ceiling shone a glittering soft light, and the whole kitchen area smelt of apple crumble and rich cedar. The former, I had made for myself and Leo after he refused to let me help with dinner, and the latter simply because of the signature scent of his house. 

It was by no means a mansion, although I'm sure it could have been had he wanted. His past was still a mystery, even after all these years. I suspect it is on purpose, and I understand how it's nobody's place to inquire about it since he very clearly wants it to remain that... the past. All that matters is the things I do know about this man, and how they paint someone who's had a long and hardship-filled life who tired of it all, packed up and moved to the other side of the world to live a small and comfortable life. I am grateful he did, otherwise I wouldn't have had anyone to turn to in this miserable town. I am equally inspired by him as well, because if he could do it then so could I. There's still hope for me, and these days I'd cling onto every last shred of it I can glean. Catching the rustling of leaves outside, I shivered at how cold that wind must be, saddened by the thought that I probably would have been freezing outside on some park bench close to the house where I lived for the last however many years and that's never once felt like home. I often did that when I was younger: when I'd fight with Em or simply rather stay out of either her and her husband's quarrels, Dean's unsolicited visits, or even 'family' get-togethers. I would wait out the night and hope they've all gone to bed so I can sneak quietly back to my room, then get up early in the morning to leave again. 

I've spent long years of my life either running or hiding. It was bound to become tiring at some point.

I hated feeling like a liability. I refused to take advantage of the kindness of people around me. I always felt that I was undeserving of it. Whether it be Maddie and her parents, Leo and Thomas, and- well, it is no use to think about it now that I feel so close to where I want to be, and yet so so far away still. 

Sending my report finally, I rubbed my eyes tiredly. My phone pinged, giving me a start. I looked at the screen to find an incoming call from none other than Tom. 

"Do you realize what hour it is?" I whispered, frowning. "Your dad's asleep."

"But you're clearly not." He retorted smartly. I can just imagine him in my head grinning like a fool. "I saw you were online so I guessed you'd still be awake. Why are you still awake?"

"I had to send an exam paper." I groaned and heard him chuckle. 

"You were still trying to make it perfect to the very last minute weren't you?" He asked.

"You're so annoying." I ignored his snickers, even though he was spot on. "If you're calling to mock me, I'm going to hang up."

"Relax, have you gotten grumpier than usual?" He cleared his throat, voice taking on a hint of serious concern. "Don't hang up. I called to ask how you're doing."

Well, it didn't take him very long at all. "I'm fine, Tom." I sighed. He would always do this, whenever he caught wind of me staying at their place, or having argued with Em.

"Dad said you probably had some argument with Em. Is she still bothering you?"

When is she ever not? "No. Nothing like that. It's all good."

"Rosie, don't lie to me." He grumbled. "I told you many times to move out. Why are you still putting up with her shit?"

"Tom, we talked about this." I slumped on the table, tiredly blinking at the fish tank on the other end of the room. "I can't accept that kind of help from you."