MAFIA'S WRONG TARGET

3: I BUILT ME

HUNTER'S POV

Hunter's Mansion,
07:32 pm

Manspreading on the couch in my dark hallway I was staring at the woodstove as it was burning languidly... just like the cigarette between my fingertips. Just like my soul...

Flames still evoke memories of that day. The day of my destruction. The day I lost everything at once. One of the hardest days of my life but the day my mother died still tops on the list of my worst days.

I lost two most important women in my life. Losing my mom broke me inside but losing Grace-

F*ck this name hurts.

Even the mere remembrance of that person hurts now who used to be my safest place.

We all die, some more than once.

She died for me. I died for her, for the world.

I'm not like them. I don't value life like they do. She ran away. I told her to run but if I was at her place... I would have preferred to die along my love.

I value death. Because death's the truth. Life's fake, it leaves but death forever follows. It's so loyal that it snatches your soul from your body to take you with it to join its embrace.

I and Grace were the same way. I chased her but she departed as if I were never a reason to remain.

I thought I'd die if she'd ever leave me. I wasn't mistaken. I was dead inside for months but those months also healed me.

I realized I needed that hurt.

Crazy...how pain helps you refocus.

I was a fool to put myself under the illusion that she was the reason I was breathing but that is far from the reality. In reality, she's the cause of these collapsing lungs and the only one capable of breathing life back into them again is me.

It still sucks to remember how I allowed the pain to deputize all other feelings in order to feel alive again. I put myself under the illusion that she was the reason I was breathing. But she's is the real reason I am hardly fucking alive.

I got way too attracted to her. I was too ready to kiss the ground she had ever walked on.

I was so so f*cked.

I've lost count of the promises I've broken for her. As well as the bones and jaws. And sadly that made me a villain.

My rule: If you can't convince them...
confuse them. That's what I did.

I was never enough for her. But I know I don't mean nothing to her. I don't have her heart but I have a piece of it. The tiniest one but I do have it. It'll never be whole.

She admits it or not but the fact is, I didn't lose her, she lost me. I'll always linger in her soul. She'll search for me in everyone she'll be with but I won't be found.

It wasn't that hard to be with me. I bet no one could ever cherish her more than me. I realized it too late but it taught me a valuable lesson that if someone doesn't fight to keep you, never fight yourself to stay.

Set them free, let them regret.

Tell me where I was wrong... Didn't I care? didn't I love? didn't I sacrifice? didn't I wait?

I did everything I had in my hands.

World!

The entire world I had in my fist which I lay under her feet but she didn't know how to walk on it. She left me broken. She didn't care, she didn't love, she didn't sacrifice, she didn't wait.