The Matchmaker who can see the red string of fate

Into his grave I draw his face

ALICE

I flipped through the pages. The pencil in my hand snapped as my grip on it tighten. I did not bother getting myself another one. I can still draw using what's left of this five inch pencil. This flimsy little thing... is already enough. Just like his lingering image in my brain...is enough to draw his sketch.

I sat, sprawled across the lush green bermuda grass. For three hours I worked on his portrait. And at last, his face took the exact replica of how he looks like. My fingers lingered at his bright playful eyes. As if touching could bring me the warmth he used to gave me.

I held my sketch book over the sun, smiling approvingly at my masterpiece. Even in drawings, he's still beautiful. The look in his eyes radiates warmth and full of life. Just the right match for his cheery dimpled smile. I held it close against my chest, feeling the soft breeze of my surrounding. as if it's his gentle spirit embracing me deeply.

A snap of branch nearby came into my ears. Someone's footsteps, and it's heading in my way.

First instinct was to be afraid. But I'm not. At least not in the cemetery. I know I can keep bad guys at bay with the rumored ghost sightings the groundkeeper spread across town.

I heard some took courage and ventured inside without permission. Taking this into account, the groundkeeper dressed me in white sheet of waterproof cloak and put a black long wig in my head.

So on the night they crept in, their heart almost burst out of their throats seeing me kneeling. Plus the gruesome horror props the groundkeeper set up in every corner, they left with their sanity barely hanging on.

I couldn't care less. I did not let all these people distract me. I'm too engrossed in the smiling face I see in front of me right now I just need to make a duplicate in the paper. Capture everything, not missing the tiniest detail.

Because it was only in the sheets of blank paper, I could keep the him whose no longer with me...to stay at my side always.

I leaned my body forward it almost touched the ground. I started forming his gorgeous cupid bow lips.

Everyday now I'm visited with evocative dreams of him. I daydream of his smile in front of me, beside me, behind me. Every corner, every nook, in every crowd, in every side of our apartment... I see his face in all of them.

So vivid, so realistic, I can hear his voice calling my name in my head. I'm torn apart by my two worlds. The reality where there's nothing of him except the memories and traces he left behind, and the illusion I put up to reject that harsh reality.

And I'm more inclined to the latter.

I breath the danky upturned smell of grass as I inclined my pencil to shade the flawless shape of the pout of his bottom lip.

Another slight touch in his messy unkempt hair and it's done. I heard the cat meowed beside me.

It's voice a thousand distance away. Like an echo. Deep down I realized, it was the two of us alone now. Me and the cat Kenneth and I found in the side street one snowy evening.

Him, is no longer a part of newly bonded family. And without him...I don't know how am I gonna survive this useless pathetic life of mine.

Alice, what are ya doin'? Hm? - Kenneth.

Drawing. - Me.

Ya love that? Drawing? - Kenneth.

Yeah. I love it. - Me.

Why? - Kenneth.

To capture beautiful scenes in a whole blank sheet of paper. - Me.

What about me? Will you trap me in that white paper of yours? - Kenneth.