Chapter 1

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Sitting on a dirty smelly room, it's cold and she's alone. She is just sitting there besides her bed listening to her parents talk trash about her but acting as if they were just having a common conversation. "Did you hear how my brothers daughter already graduated from high school and is now working and going to school". her step dad was a hypocrite but acted as if he actually care for her other than her body" Her mom was clueless and left her when she was 4 with her grandparents and she went to the USA and got married to a guy who now was her dad?! The girl was alone and never experienced fatherly or motherly love . She was just a 5 years old yet she was being overly sexualized and over that she was beat for everything she did, she never had no one to run to... Her mom was having babies while her daughter was alone in her homeland. Her mom was s hypocrite. Her mom was always blaming her for her wrong doings. Her mom never apologized for living her for 7 years. Her mom was the reason why this girl looked for confort in other ladies around her. Her mom was the reason why she was self conscious of herself and developed insecurities. Her mom was the reason why the little girl felt left out and alone which made her beg for attention. Was I in the wrong for turning out to be a disgusting disappointment? Was it my step
Dads fault for manipulating my mom? Was it my moms fault for being such a shitty mom?
Tell me... or maybe just maybe was it a gods fault?

I think everyone has their own flaws but is it right for people to make fun of those flaws? Is it right to compare? I have given it my all to making my creators proud of me. I have not thought of myself in the process. All I wanted was their approval. But how about now? I have no personality and all I do is manipulate everyone around me as if they were me and I was my parents. Realizing that I have no emotions in me but attachment issues and obsessiveness. Let me tell you about it. My name is Ken Conalar I moved to the us when I was 11 years old and my family is religious asf(as fuck). I was abused as a child so I was never mentally stable growing up, but as a Hispanic household they never believe in mental illness and blame it on the devil(satan). I was an insecure child growing up and I craved for attention so I would be the "ugly funny girl" or some people just called me annoying ha. Anyways when I was in junior year I had gone thru puberty and I went to school after quarantine happened, now I'm 5,3 I'm brown skinned, I got 2 nose piercings and my nipples pierced I got pierced my nipples and my parents don't know about anything but one of the nose piercings and the ear ones. Smoking 24/7 high on acid, edibles, shrooms I would do anything to forget about my past and my parents at home....

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