The Art Of Robbing

The Jacuzzi of Jacuzzis--- DON'T READ YET

          "Say it. Out loud. Say it." Edwards's teddy bear like voice spoke into Bella's ear.

     I myself have no interest in the Twilight Saga or anybody in it... maybe other than that Rosalie girl. She's pretty hot. The thing is people are always bashing on it and if I want to join the crowd of people that have an intimate hate for the weirdo pale chick, I need to know about it. That's another thing about my lifestyle. I can't just go on and start bashing on or do something without having a deeper understanding of the situation.

     My hand dug into the potato chips sitting in my lap and felt around until I felt the very clear outline of a big chip. Pulling it out and chewing on it, I continued to watch the so called movie that was being displayed on the screen attached to the back of the driver's seat. The van was parked in a Wal-mart parking lot in the very back away from the crowds and screaming children. This Wal-mart was also a twenty four hour one so I wouldn't be surprised if we were spending the night in the lot of pavement. The sun hadn't set but the sky was starting to be illuminated by light oranges and royal blue.

     "A magical freakin' pixie," I answered Robert Pattison's request the same time Bella answered, "Vampire."

    A sly grin slid up my face and I threw my hands up in the air, "Lies! All lies!"

     I continued to watch the pair make a complete fool of themselves but get paid higher than most actors as I slid another chip into my mouth. Andy was out. He had to go exchange the diamonds from the house I broke in today for money. I had no clue where he went or how he did it, but he got the job done. There was one time when I actually tried to figure out how he played his role in the black market, but it was no place for me. From that moment on I learned not to question my fellow partner in crime and just go with it. He'd do most of the background checks and exchanges and I'd do the main action part.

     Two more minutes into the movie, I heard the certain pattern of knocks we've agreed on from outside the van. Getting up from the beanbag chair and pausing the movie, I walked through the van with my back hunched over to open the door. Yeah, the van would never win the roomiest award. But it was a van; our van. Andy stood with a backpack around his shoulder and a grim look on his face. He cocked his head up and gave me his frequent nod, the dark brown wig bobbing along.

     "You're impossibly fast, and strong. Your skin is... pale white and ice cold. Your eyes change color. And sometimes you speak like you're from a different time. You never eat or drink anything. You don't go out in the sunlight. How old are you?" I imitated Bella's voice but going two pitches way higher than any person I've heard. All the while, placing my hand on my heart and pretending to look anxious.

     Andy dipped his head down trying to get a double chin and looked up at me with his eyes trying to look as much of a fail vampire as possible, "Seventeen."

     He had watched this movie before a few weeks ago. I remember how he was laughing so hard while I was driving us to Alberta from B.C. We were still in Alberta though; it was a good place to stay for now, "How long have you been seventeen?"

     "Awhile," Andy answered, lowering his voice to more of a frog croak before bringing it back to his normal tone, "No. I just been seventeen longer than you!"

     He was still laughing as he jumped into the van and shut the door behind him. The whole van shook as he slammed the door. Plopping himself down onto the second beanbag chair, he slid his backpack off and threw it towards me. I caught it with one hand and tried to weigh it. It was heavy. With a pleased smile on my face, I opened the zipper up. Stacks of green paper laid bundled up in the backpack and left no air to breathe. Zipping it back up, I threw the backpack back to Andy.