.Tape 1.

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I wake up to yelling. Like it is every morning. I don't know why it's like this like it's not that hard to get up. I go to sleep at 11:00 and wake up at 6:30. She goes to sleep at 8:00 and wakes up at like 7:00. She has it easy for her but still doesn't want to wake up. Taking a shower makes me sick but it feels like a good sick. My skin is dry because of the cold winter, so taking a 20 min shower doesn't really help I don't like seeing my body naked and I'm scared someone is going to see "them" the burns on my thigh to the cuts on my arm. No one can see them, if they do it there fault not mine. I do it where nobody can see. I do it where nobody can feel them. I hop out of the shower and look in the mirror, I love myself but not the things I have done.

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