i will ||| stozier

prologue

...will i wait a lonely lifetime?

if you want me to

i will...

may 12th

Richie Tozier was never one to talk about his feelings, thats why when he was suddenly at the doorstep of Beverly Marsh with tears streaming down his face she only stood in shock.

after a few beats had passed he sighed exasperatedly and rolled his eyes "well?! can i come in?"

she quickly recovered from the shock and wrapped an arm around him "yes! yes,of course" she replied leading him inside. They made their way into her bedroom. "my dads working late so we should be good for a while, what's going on? has something happened?" she asked as they sat side by side on her bed.

"no. yes? i dont know i-i just need- i didn't know where else to go." he said trying to regulate his breathing.

"okay okay calm down; breathe. do you want to talk about it?" she began to stroke his hair.

"i dont know- i-i-i cant! im- look." he took a deep breath. "i think...i think im gay." he said as he began to cry again

"hey! hey its okay! its okay love im here. why are you crying? its okay."

"bev...i-i...i dont know what to do. i haven't told anyone else...something happened today and i just..i couldnt keep living with it by myself."

"talk to me rich. you're okay."

he had calmed down a bit and swallowed harshly before saying "i was walking to the store and i saw someone laying in the grass...upon closer inspection i saw it was stan. he had fallen asleep probably watching for his little birds..."

richie jogged over and looked down at the boy sleeping like a rock. he giggled quietly to himself before shaking him awake with his shoe.

"AHH!" the curly headed boy awoke suddenly. "oh. its you."

"good morning to you too stanny" richie said making a heart with his hands with a goofy smile.

"shut it. what are you doing here?"

"how could you say something so harsh mr. uris!" richie replied in what seemed to be a sweet southern accent, draping his hand over his forehead and feigning hurt. "the real question is what are you doing sleeping in the middle of town"

stan rolled his eyes as he tried to kill a smirk growing on his face. "i must've fallen asleep. now help me up, idiot" he reached up for richies hand

richie began to pull him up then suddenly let go, before he stanley could fall he grabbed onto richie shirt sending them both tumbling to the ground.

"you asshole!" stan said hitting the other boy repeatedly.

"AH! im sorry im sorry please!"

they both laughed for a solid 30 seconds and as they began to try and catch their breath they stared at each other, richie becoming encapsulated by the eyes of one stanley uris. he felt himself falling deeper into him, subconsciously leaning a tiny bit closer. they both became suddenly aware of their position, richie hovering over stan.

"get off of me!" stan screeches, pushing richie off of him.

richie takes a few moments to recalibrate before standing up and dusting himself off. "okay! no more falling asleep in the public staniella! cool?"

stan rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "yeah yeah whatever"

"then i shall be on my way. pip! pip! cherrio!"

"and then i just walked away. it was a small thing but ive been- feeling these things when..im around him. and- and its only him."

"sooo maybe youre not gay? maybe youre just stan-sexual" beverly replied giggling

"are you serious? this is not the time bev!!!" richie through his hands down on his lap while groaning

"okay okay okay im sorry! just- i dont know what to say. do you like him?"

"wh- i mean- ugh! i dont know! its so confusing! like there are moments where i feel like i want to grab him by the face and passionately make out with him but then the moment leaves and i remember we're- friends."

"honestly richie...i dont know what to tell you. just know i love you and you can come to me with anything i just might not always know what to say or how to help." she rests a reassuring hand on his knee

"thank you. i love you too beaver-ly" he says biting back a laugh

they talk about everything more with the not so occasional tangent from the both of them until it gets late and richie decides to go home (both his mom and beverly's dad would go crazy if he were to stay at her house, which is ironic given the circumstance) they say their goodbyes and richie makes his way home finally feeling lighter after months of dread and anxiety.