First Love

You were special to me in a way I would not have understood at the young age my feelings had developed. Your messy brown hair added a certain cuteness to your sideways grin. You dark brown eyes reminded me so much of chocolate. You protected me like your little sister, but now I know that it was something more.

As kids we would play together and you would never discourage me from doing things that guys did. The guys down the street would always say I couldn't ride my bike like a guy and you stuck up for me. I did little to back you up when I fell onto the road, but you came back to help me up. I thought I would marry you when I was eight, a sweet innocent dream I had held since that day on. You were my protector, my shoulder to cry on, my friend to play with. My feelings had developed slowly compared to yours.

Remember that day when we were in high school? The one a week before prom? I was going to ask you to go with me, but then you asked someone else. I don't know why you did it, maybe it was because I didn't seem interested. I was hurt, you know? I ended up going with someone else and after that... we had just become friends.

I still liked you, more than I should. You and your girl friend seemed to have a good time together. I supported you, though, for reasons unknown.

We drifted apart, me with my boyfriend and you with you life. I made it through college, got married, and now have two kids. I still love you, you know? You were my first love. I wonder what would have happened if I had told you? What would have happened if you had asked me to prom? It's too late now, your already gone. You were too nice, you know?

I told my daughter about you, she said you seemed nice. I told her how you ended and she said you should be proud. I can't help to wonder, though, what would have happened? Would you have still died?