Present Mixed in the Past

Chapter 27| Breaking Down

"Harry, I think it's time for you to start your training." was what Sirius said as they were driving off to Grimmauld for the summer.

"My training?" The boy tilted his head.

The dog like man nodded, a comforting grin forming on his lips.

"Yes. For your heirship. Proper training at least, not just in etiquette and manners. Most pureblood families start training their heir around your age and then claim them when they're fourteen. Earlier if things start threatening their child."

Harry watched as Sirius's grip on the steering wheel tightened. He guessed he was still uptight about Lockhart. At least his hearing would be happening that weekend. If everything went according to the plan, and in extension the rule of the laws, Lockhart would become completely bankrupt, thrown into debt and having to work for the Goblins for maybe a few decades before finally living in Azkaban for another few decades.

"Alright!" He smiled to the older man, who relaxed very little at the easy going look.

Sirius glanced over to Remus, who also held a concerned look. They both wanted to say something, ask something. Finally steeling some Gryffindor courage, that in other situations could be called stupidity, Remus turned to face Harry in the backseat.

The boy's innocent green eyes looked up to see his other Godfather looking at him intently. His eyes were shimmering with an amber-gold hue. It seemed his wolf side was wanting to come out.

"Harry, are you okay?"

The young tween frowned and tilted his head in confusion. He knew for certain he wasn't asking about him physically. But it didn't make complete sense to ask about him mentally. He was roughly 250 years old! He had his fair share of squabbles and fights that he barely made it out of. He could handle this.

"I'm fine?"

Remus frowned more, concern growing heavier on his appearance. He seemed to have aged a few decades before the boy's eyes, making him grow worried as well.

"Harry... You were..." His eyes flared more vibrantly before he squeezed them shut and took a deep breath. When he calmed down, he continued. "You shouldn't be fine or alright... Please," he looked at him desperately, "tell us the truth. Are you okay? Physically, mentally, emotionally?"

The old soul blinked, tears brimming his eyes as he thought of everything. He was so old, and he had to let go of so many things, he was used to that. Everyone leaned on him, everyone expected him to be strong, even the other Gods. He doesn't blame them; it was just a natural state of being for him. He didn't have anyone to lean against because he made himself look like the strongest and sturdiest pillar. Yet, someone who knew nothing of what happened to him, asked him if he was okay. Just like what Draco did whenever everything came out. He brushed the question off, but now...

His lips trembled as he truly thought of the question, bowing his head as the tears began to run down. Every horrible emotion and thought bubbled to the surface, forcing him to finally acknowledge them.

There was so much anger and resentment for the Dursleys, the bad Weasleys, Lucius, and so many other people who had made his life hell. But that was almost nothing compared to how he felt about that man. There was so much rage and hatred for the single man who had orchestrated it all, Dumbledore. He had thought so many ways of killing him, torturing him and making him beg for mercy! But he was already dead and there was nothing he could do.

The guilt for holding all that anger and resentment. For having all of those dark thoughts and the desire to use Dark spells he was conditioned to hate. It only worsened when it became clear that he never had to suffer in the first place. That the war could've been avoided, at least to some degree.

The shame for how he was raised and treated. How he was unable to protect the people that had meant so much to him. The people that had genuinely cared for him and wanted to be by his side.

The restless nights till he learned to stop dreaming because if he dreamt it all would just be nightmares. Everything he pushed down and away because the world and his friends needed to see a pillar of hope and light. Someone to stand tall... It all suddenly weighed and crashed onto him like a never-ending tidal wave threatening to drown him.

"I-I don't know..." He finally admitted.

Remus and Sirius frowned as they heard that weak voice and they felt their hearts break. Yet, their resolve only hardened more. Their boy went through so much already, and now he was on new grounds. He needed them more than ever. They were going to grow stronger in every way they could to keep him safe. To make sure that he could be a child for as long as he wants to be.

"It's okay not to know... But me and Sirius are here to listen to you, to help you." Remus reached over and placed a comforting hand on the old soul's knee.

Harry gave him a weak smile before he broke into quiet sobs. Thankfully they were home and Sirius was finally able to hold his strong godson. He held the boy close to his chest and hurried off to the living room with Remus trailing behind.

"Kreacher."

The stubborn house elf popped in before his eyes widen at the sight of the sobbing heir. He then popped away without another word, already knowing what his Master and Heir needed.

The men soon made it to the neatened living room, and they cuddled their godson, rocking him gently. They didn't say anything, knowing that he had heard them all before and there was nothing that could be said that would help. All they could do was hold him tight and love him now. If they were to die later, or at the same time as before, they were going to make sure he knew that they would always be there, even in death. That they loved him so deeply and dearly.

Once Harry had calmed down, they had noticed Kreacher had brought in cups of hot chocolate with some treacle tarts and a few other sweets. Harry gave a watery laughed before the adults began to feed him the sweets along with the chocolate beverage.

He loved them so much. He would have to tell them everything soon, but not right now... He wants them to continue to look at him like they were. Like he truly was a twelve-year-old child.