hello !
i'll let you read a part of a text i wrote back in june (it's still december).
16/06/22
I don't even remember how I discovered shifting. I just remember the emotion I felt when I learned that I could meet my favourite characters, this inexplicable excitement and joy that filled my whole body, and never left me.
I'd lie if I told you that my shifting journey hasn't started yet, but it did. It did when I first tried to shift and failed. The vulnerability after every failed attempt didn't quit me, it stuck to me and has now become a part of me. Do I feel ashamed ? Kinda. Ashamed when I see everyone on TikTok succeed and having good feelings when I can't do it. I keep repeating to myself ; why can't I ? Why everyone else but me ? What's wrong with me ? And my motivation is just lower and lower everyday since.
Why do I keep trying though ? Deep down, if I don't have hope, why every night, I keep repeating myself that I'm in my DR, and that I will do magic tomorrow ? Because once you've discovered shifting, you can't escape it until you succeed. I can't just give up, because I know that I can do it. That's true, I mean, what do other people have more than me ?
That's when I realized that I can't keep comparing myself to others. It's not a competition. "you've succeeded after one year of trying ? I did it after 4 months !" okay Karen. I do it my way, and if that's how I feel comfortable, nobody should have their word to say. You are in charge of your own actions and beliefs, and you should never let people demotivate you. Everyone has already dreamt of being in Hogwarts, or in their favourite show, in an era they like... Because what would it be like ?
I want to know what shifting feels like. I want to know what flying feels like. I want to know what using a wand feels like. I want to know how to transfigure a rat to a glass. I want to laugh with my friends. I want to learn stories from my dad and his friends, I want to prank Hogwarts with the twins. I want to sit by the lake with a book in the beginning of autumn, feeling the sweet waft on my face. I want to know what food taste like. I want to shift so bad.
OkAy. This is kinda cute but at the same time so embarrassing. this was me 6 months ago :/
byyye
YOU ARE READING
my shifting journey (messy)
Non-Fictionthis is only a way to put my thoughts in order. I won't promise i am regular because i'm clearly not, but i'll try and post updates on my attempts and maybe motivation etc... I think this journal will be focused on my Hogwarts dr ! Also, english is...
