Lovers Lie

5

Some things should remain behind locked doors, stupid asshole. Just when I thought he'd talk he closed back up. I looked back out the window. I can't keep laying around, I need to at least shower. It hit me again, he's been here since eight. 

He missed so much. So, so, so much. I shook my head and got up. I walked to the bathroom door and opened it. The bathroom was the same light gray shade as the walls. The lights have a warm but bright tint. The counters were a nice marble with gray cabinets on the bottom. The toilet which had a towel holder across from it, and lastly the glass shower with beautiful gray tiles.

 I looked at myself in the mirror, my hair a mess, my glasses gone, and my skin pale. I looked horrible. Holdon said there were products under the counter for me, let's just hope they're good. I crouched down and opened the cabinet. There was a basket full of stuff, I pulled it out and set it on the counter. I shut the cabinets and stood up, this left me a little lightheaded. 

I held onto the counter and let my head lay between my arms, I waited until the pain ceased. I looked up and scanned the basket. There was shampoo, conditioner, body wash, a razor, a brush and comb, some hair ties, and other essentials. I wonder if he got all this stuff for me. No. That doesn't matter. I grabbed the shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and razor. I placed the stuff in the wall cut out. His stuff was in here, I decided to just ignore it.

 I walked back to the counter and grabbed a hair tie and some face wash. I placed both of these down in the shower before turning it on. I adjusted the water until it was the perfect temperature. I turned on the bathroom fan and grabbed a towel placing it on the holder. The mirror was already foggy. The air was hot. I miss my bathroom. I miss all my products. I just miss it all.

 I didn't mean to start crying, it just happened. I let myself cry as I took off my clothes and stepped in the shower. The water stung but I made no effort to adjust it. I'm so tired. I just blanked my head and start shampooing my hair. I run my fingers through the mess and rinse it. I'm so tired.

 I put the conditioner in my hands and rub it through the ends of my hair before tying it back. There was so much steam that it felt suffocating, I still made no choice to adjust the water. I reached for the washcloth as the air struggled to fill my lungs. I wash my body and shave quickly. I wash my face lightly and untie my hair, I let the water run through my hair till it's completely rinsed. I feel dizzy as I reach to run the water off.

 I grab my towel and step out of the shower as I dry off. Breathe, I tell myself to just breathe. I finally get the oxygen I've been craving. I walk to the basket and grab the lotion. I apply it gently while rubbing it in thoroughly. I brush my hair and braid it back. I brush my teeth and moisturize before turning the fan off and walking out. 

 I forgot to grab clothes so I opened the drawer grabbing some sweats, underwear, socks, and a sports bra. I walk to the closet and grab a shirt before walking back to the bathroom. I shut the door and got dressed. I put some deodorant and perfume on before looking in the mirror. I wore a black long sleeve shirt and some gray baggy sweats. My socks were just plain black. Everything was...comfy. I walked back out the bathroom and shut the light out.

 I walked over to the bench and stared out the window. I sat down and stretched my feet across the cushion. I rested my head against the window while listening to the wind blow past. I shut my eyes and just enjoyed the quiet.