home in your arms || showki.

one : despair lines the fate.

cold.

it's immensely cold - the vicinity freezing with streets layered in thick white snow. a few people wrapped in several pieces of clothing walked around letting trails of light fog escape their chapped lips. and there was one thing common among them all.

they all had a warm smile adorning their faces in the frosty weather.

how in contrast with the one blankly staring at them through the window - his eyes flooded with glum.

it was festive season and kihyun considered it ironical. they all said "it's the season in which your wishes come true. everyone becomes happy and lively during this time."

such a darn lie.

here he was, fettered by the shackles of his house. he hated how he was confined in such a warm place and yet, his heart felt cold.

and then he realized, his heart had been frozen for most of his life. and each time this realization hit him, he felt like screaming his lungs, pull out at his hair in agitation and break every object hindering his path of self destruction. he knew he was in dire need of consultance 'cause as much as he had tried to evade the fact, he knew his mental health was in a horrible condition and was deteriorating with each passing day. he felt worse all the time and to keep himself away from the haunting thoughts that bloomed his insomnia every night, he'd keep himself. he'd tire the heck out of himself in order to return home and fall into a dark dungeon out of exhaustion. he did succeed in that but internally, he was a mess ‐ an absolute havoc caused by the several tribulations of his mind.

but now that he was on his winter break from work that paid him enough to survive, he had nothing to keep himself from the aching reality and thus, here he was - zoning out while staring at the lively environment outside his house.

he'd never dare to say it but sometimes, he wished he could be happy as well. he just carried a small wish which was left in the most untouched corner of his heart, devoured by the sorrow engraved within him. once in a while, he'd let his tears out at the thought of being happy for once in life.

he wished nothing more than to have a place he could call home. not a house - he had that - but home, he craved for that.

letting out a heavy exhale, he drew the curtains preventing the only source of light - the moonlight - into his room, letting the dark take over. he knew he'd not be able to sleep but it was better to stay numb in the dark rather than aggravating the condition of your already aching heart by seeing how joyful everyone is - that's what he believed.

before he could drown into the unending void of his thoughts, he was interrupted by the ringing of a bell - his doorbell to be precise.

clicking his tongue in annoyance, he dragged himself towards his door, not paying any heed to his zombie-like condition. he opened the door with a slight force and froze after seeing a tall, well-built, really handsome man with soft facial features, like that of a bear - polar bear 'cause it was snowing outside. yes, that makes more sense, he thought.

the bear like man cleared his throat as he felt awkward under the gaze of this lovely and cuddly boy - well, he looked cuddly. kihyun snapped out of his trance and blinked a couple of times before the man introduced himself and hesitantly extended his hand.

"hey...uhm...i'm hyunwoo, and i'm new in this society and 'cause i live on this floor...i thought it'd be good to...you know, befriend my neighbor. so...hi."

kihyun found his voice soft and deep and him talking so endearing that his sub-conscious acted before he could and held the man's hand gently, giving it a light squeeze.

"myself k-kihyun, nice to meet you...hyunwoo."

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oh god it took me so long to update but finally, yes, we've begun with the story !! and there'd be more dialogues from the next chapter (i hope)