Voyage

I Still Have Faith In You

"Look Mama, you're in the newspaper." Linda threw a newspaper on the table as she entered Agnetha's house. 

"Is there a reason I should read it or just the typical stuff?" Agnetha took a sip from her tea cup and looked up at her daughter. 

"Oh Mama. Why are you always so uninterested in what the press writes about you?" Linda sat down at the table next to her mother. 

"I've had enough from the press. You have no idea what they wrote about the years. Do you know how that feels?" A tear started running down Agnetha's right cheek and she quickly rubbed with the sleeve of her blouse over her face. 

"I know what they wrote. I read it. Every single article that was released about you and ABBA worldwide and I can understand your fear but you cannot close yourself away from the public." 

"I can and I will." Agnetha looked her daughter straight into the eye. "If you think it's so important, tell me, what is the article about, music or my private life?" 

"Mostly about the new album. Looks like the world is looking forward to the release in two weeks." 

"Then, is there a possibility that I might read it later. Why did you came over? Hopefully not just to talk with me about the press." 

"No I didn't, but that's something we should do." 

"No." Agnetha tone of voice was certain. 

"No?" Linda looked at her mother confused. 

"No. I will not talk about that theme. Certainly not with you." 

"But it's an important theme. I-" Linda wanted to explain her pint of view to her bother but Agnetha interrupted her. 

"I said 'no' Linda and I mean 'no'." Agnetha didn't mean to snap at her daughter but accidentally did. 

"Listen, I can understand that you don't want to talk with me about your problems. You want to protect me and I can understand that after all am I your daughter but you also have to understand me. I am concerned about you because you keep closing yourself away and this is not only about the press. It's about Papa, right?" Linda looked at her with a serious expression on her face. 

Agnetha replied nothing and just looked down. 

"I knew it. You still love him. All the time. That's why your marriage with Thomas broke apart, because you loved Papa all the time. He is the love of your life and has ever been." 

"NO!" Agnetha finally found the courage to speak again. "That's nonsense. I don't love Björn we are just getting well along with each other. The only reason why I kept contact to him are you and your brother. And Thomas, that's nothing for you." Agnetha knew she was lying. She loved Björn endlessly . Linda was right with everything what she said. 

"Mama, I'm not a child anymore. Yes, I was just five when you separated but I recognized many things in your behave back then. I didn't manage to put it in a picture back then I was too small to realize but by now do I know sure that you were so depressed after you left because you loved him. You were sad when he married again and had Emma and Anna with Lena because you loved him all this time and now is the right time to tell him." 

Agnetha replied nothing. Should she admit what her daughter was telling her or keep telling that it was nonsense? 

"Mama?" The worried sound of Lindas voice brought Agnetha back to reality. 

"Mhm." 

Linda took Agnetha's hand and stroke it. "You should talk with Papa. I don't like to see you sad." 

"No." 

"Come on Mama. Are you afraid of his reaction?" Linda looked at her. "Do you really believe he doesn't loves you. He is divorcing Lena because he realized how much he still loves you. Why do you have to be so complicated? You love him, he loves you. He wants you back and you? Don't you also want him back?" 

"Sure I do." Agnetha first realized what she was saying when it was too late. 

"You see? And now go and talk to him or do I have to force you to do it?" Linda reassuringly smiled at Agnetha. 

"It's not that easy darling. Love is complicated. I cannot just go to him and say 'Hej Björn, how are you? Oh, by the way, I still love you, how about going on a date tonight?'." 

"That sound's like a good idea." 

"Sure it does." Agnetha tone of voice was ironic but Lindas wasn't." 

"I didn't mean it as a joke. You should go on a date with him, tonight."  

"No" Agnetha shook her head. "I won't even think about it." 

"You're already thinking about it." 

"Forget it! It's better this way." 

"No, it isn't I want my parents to be a couple! Don't you have anymore faith in Papa?" 

"I sure do, he is the father of both my children." 

"Then talk with him. I will call him." With that being said got Linda up and went to the telephone before Agnetha could protest. 

"Hej Papa ... Yes exactly I'm at Mamas ... No, nothing happened to her, she's completely fine, so calm down ... Äh, yes, I was calling you because Mama wants to invite you for dinner ... She will cook so you don't have to bring anything ... No, just the two of you ... I'll tell her, goodbye ..." A few seconds later hung Linda up and turned around to look at her mother who was still sitting at the table, now with her head between her arms. 

"I'm supposed to greet you from Papa and tell you he is looking forward to your dinner. What are you going to cook? I can buy something for you, I need to go to the market anyway." 

"You remind me of your aunt." Was everything Agnetha replied. 

"Mona or Eva?" 

"Not your actually aunt, Frida." 

"I do?" 

"Yeah, she also used to do stuff like that, but I won't go in detail, not now. You can ask her when you meat her next time. 

"Fine, now go, search a recipe for tonight and then tell me what you need."