Thirty Days With Ken

[SISSY]

That name up there? Well, that's me. My name is [Sylvie Simond] and I'm from [Geneva, Switzerland]. Sissy is usually the nickname given to girls named Sylvie in France and the French-speaking parts of Switzerland. But right now, I'm not home.

I live in Japan, in a small, remote village outside of Tokyo. I am a gaikoku hito or gaijin, like all other expats here. My Japanese friends couldn't pronounce my name, so some would call me Shishi, which is a small, snake-like aquatic creature you find in the local waters. But they did that to tease me. They ended up calling me Ai 愛, which means love in Japanese. Thankfully, my American friend, Akiko (she's half Japanese, too) doesn't have that same dilemma since "Sissy" is easy for her to say.

Why am I here in Japan? Well, I study fashion design here. I've been here since September which is the start of classes in my school. I like to paint in my free time. But why Tokyo, of all places, when I live so close to Italy and France, and even New York?

Let me tell you more about myself. Perhaps you'll understand why I've chosen to live thousands of miles away from home.

My father is Swiss-French, and my mom's part Swiss, part Filipino. I am an only child. At 12, my parents got divorced. It was a terrible one because my mom didn't take it well, and me, being a pre-teen, was a disaster in itself. I know. I'm such a cliché. But the cliché stops there.

My maternal grandparents retired to the south of the Philippines. When my Swiss grandfather passed away, my grandmother fell ill from a broken heart. Because of this, my mom decided to go back to the Philippines to care for her. It was also the perfect excuse to run away from my unfaithful father. So she literally dragged me and my thirteen-year-old self out of Switzerland against my will, leaving all of my friends and my life behind. I hated her so much.

We flew to the Philippines and stayed there for five years so my mom could focus on nursing for her mother and herself, too. It was bittersweet. Despite the depression, I've slowly transformed. And honestly, I grew to love my life there.

My grandmother got better, and I went back to Switzerland to finish university. I've visited my grandmother every summer since then.

But when I finished university, I found a job and worked in Zurich. That's how life just.. Well, it came and went. I probably had the time of my life, going around Europe with friends, and maybe lovers, and forgot to look back. I totally neglected going back to the Philippines.

Sorry, I'm a scatterbrain. And I'm cheating. All of this isn't actually based on my personal memory.

You see, I was in a snowboarding accident exactly a year ago and lost an enormous chunk of my memory. When I woke up from a coma three days later, I was in utter confusion. I could  only remember my childhood and a few people in my past. 

After many months of tests and rehabilitation on my right knee, I was able to walk properly again. Doctors diagnosed me with a strange case of amnesia. I'll explain it, but bear with me, 'coz it gets really weird.

I could not, for the life of me, remember anything from when I was 12 till the snowboard accident before turning 22.

Why, you say, is so significant about that time, aged 12 to 22?

It was from exactly the time my parents got divorced until the snowboard accident. I never remember taking the plane to the Philippines and how I collided with a skier on the slope, causing an almost-fatal concussion in my head. Stories of my adolescence till the day of my accident come from family and friends. Photos and videos of everyone helped a lot, too. I wasn't able to access my cloud, so it's like starting from scratch, really. I started back at one.

When I was trapped in a coma for three days straight, I was going around in circles, in a beautiful park filled with Sakura trees. I didn't know what I was waiting for. I was just there. Walking, walking, and walking. Waiting, and waiting, and waiting. 

And now that it's been a year since the accident, the dream just faded through time. Though I still have flashbacks of the garden, the rest is all but a blur now.

Understandably, it was one of the most difficult stages for me. As a young girl, they took me out of the life I was so used to while my parents were in a battled divorce. I mean, who wouldn't want to erase those memories? Right?

Funny thing. When I woke up, the first person I saw was my estranged father. We reconciled last year. It's been great. But still, this does not answer why I'm in Japan.

To tell you honestyly, I really don't exactly know why I'm here. It's like some voice at the back of my head told me to come here; to leave my fast-paced life in Switzerland and fly across the globe to a strange land. But the cherry blossoms, though. Isn't that enough to come here? But to live here? 

It's that dream that still lingers even when I've already woken up from the coma. Yes, that could be it. I want to see the cherry blossoms bloom,  just like the magical Sakura garden in my dream. 

But that's not just what I want to talk to you about. You see, I met this boy a few days ago. He's quite perplexing, and I couldn't quite get why I'm so affected by him and his presence. Thing is, he's on vacation, but he's flying out of Japan soon. And this is making me so sad right now. 

The Sakura leaves are in full bloom and I'm supposed to be my happiest. I've literally been dreaming of this moment. I even picture myself dancing under one tree the moment the flowers will go into full bloom. But oddly, my heart's about to get crushed into a million pieces.

Sigh, I don't usually get this emotional over a guy I just met. Or have I?

I'd love to sit and talk over coffee so I can tell you everything. Like from Day 1, if you're interested to know. Well, I do have all the time in the world now, 'coz I'm alone again. By the way, I just turned twenty-four today. And the boy I just met? His name is Ken. 

And he's leaving today. On my birthday.