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well. there I was, naked. In the shower.
the heat was making my body ache, my arms had rashes and bruises from the hot temperature.
"ah fuck." I whisper as I get up, if I stay here for another 5 minutes I'll. die probably
I get myself a towel and just collapse to my bed, fuck being naked, fuck this.
I turn off my phone, silencing all notifications cause I was so fucking tired of everything. so tired of life. the world. in general.
-
I woke up, it was 10:30 pm, late in the night, I opened my phone to see a message from sapnap with a picture attached.
it was a screenshot of dream, telling him what I asked him to do. I felt. So fucking betrayed.
BY MY OWN FRIEND. I know it's bad and I shouldn't even have even asked her to do that but I was so curious and tired of liking sapnap
(dms)
sapnap
don't get mad at dream.
karl
Oh. I'm going offline, this is too awkward I'm going to log out
I can easily move on it's fine it's fine
can we move on please
sapnap
okay. we can move on.
(dms end)
I started kicking the wall, having a total melt down, screaming in my pillow
I just wanted to die. I'm not good with rejection, nor embarrassment.
I just want to fucking kill myself so bad. So fucking bad
I logged out of. discord and I just stared there for a second.
am I not good enough?
is there someone else?
does he like George?
am I not his boyfriend anymore?
did he never like me?
so many fucking questions in my mind that I can't fucking answer, cause I'm an idiot.
I fell inlove with my bestfriend.
maybe he still loves me. maybe. I still have a chance
but what if I don't, what if he never loves me? what if I just ended our friendship?
I needed to log into discord and fix this, even if I'm just in tears. Even if I'm already fucking lifeless on my bed.
nevermind, noone cares right? noone cares about me right?
------
I have a similar experience to what Karl did, so I used the messages the person, I used to like which was my bestfriend sent to me.
( this whole story is based of how I feel about her.) you'll see in the end
YOU ARE READING
hopeless antics. | karlnap angst
Romancehopeless romance, a love trope. but did it always end up in the happy ending they say it'll be? what if you try so hard to make this person yours but realize, you just can't have a relationship with them, no matter how hard you try, but there's alwa...
