Stranger With All My Secrets

CHAPTER 2

Maria Lopez

I'm sitting in my eighteen year-old sister's room searching through her closet. I don't usually wear her clothes; but tonight's different. Tonight I'm going on my first date in over a year.

When I decided to start getting ready for tonight, I chose to get dressed first. That was when I realised all my clothes were oversized at-home comfy clothes. I've never been a 'dressy kind of gal' but I do really want to make a good impression tonight.

I met the guy through my friend, Jackie. She's been nagging me to get out of the house for so long. It's not like I stay at home all the time... I mean, I do go out every now and then for groceries. And to get the mail. If they count?

"What about this?" My sister, Julia, asks.

She's holding a tiny, red sleeveless mini-dress.

"As if I could fit into that. Plus, red isn't my colour." I say.

"Try it on. If I can fit into it, so can you." She hands me the dress and leaves the room so I can get changed.

In a not-so-good way, she's right. Since my life first started going downhill, I've lost over twenty kilograms. I've tried to make up for my sins in different ways of self harm; starving myself, carving wounds into my thighs and burning my self with any lighter I can get my hands on. None of those shitty methods work.

I refuse to take up therapy. I don't want anyone knowing anything about me that they don't need to know, let alone a stranger who's being paid to listen.

I don't even tell those who know me best my deepest, darkest secrets. The secrets in which overtime I've buried deep within me, folded into a chamber in the back of my head.

I slide into the red dress and look at myself in the mirror. I have never felt comfortable wearing tight mini dresses. Today is no exception. The girl I see in the reflection of the mirror looks out-of-place. She lacks self confidence and looks... empty.

I hear a knock at Julia's bedroom door. Assuming it's her, I tell her to come in. Except, it's not Julia.

It's Rob, my step father.

"Nice dress..." He says, examining my body with his eyes.

Instead of replying, I attempt to cover my exposed body with my hands. I still feel naked, though.

Rob takes a step toward me, and I take a step back. My back meets the wall and I take a quick breath in. He frowns slightly and raises his hands.

"I'm not here for you. I'm looking for your sister to tell her that her mother is calling for her." With that, he walks away from me and slams the door behind him.

Rob has only hurt me once. But that one night is a night I'll never be able to forget. Whenever he's near me, I still get a very uneasy feeling. I haven't told anyone about the night, not even my sister.

"Julia?" I yell.

"Coming," I hear her say from the kitchen.

Following her voice comes footsteps until the reach the door. She opens it with a smile.

"You look so pretty!" She says.

"Thanks." I say, still looking at myself in the mirror.

I tug down the bottom of the dress to make it some-what longer.

"You got a text." Julia says, reaching for my phone on her bed.

"Who from?" I ask, taking my phone out of her hands.

I scroll through my notifications.

Hey. Meet me at Jack N Jim's Bar at 6:30.

It's a text from the guy I'm supposed to be meeting tonight. It's four o'clock now, so that gives me almost two hours to get ready.

I text him back.

See you soon.