adoration.

next to me.

" i wish i could live with out you, but you're apart of me. wherever i go you'll always be next to me"

"oh uh"
fuck. you felt bad turning one down, though it'd be safer going with cam, you could not pass the opportunity to have some alone time with ed; and either way, it was going to be awkward. you stood there, hands grasping your skirt, you weren't use to being put on the spot like this

"i'll probably just walk, i have to pick something up on the way home anyways, maybe tomorrow you can drop me?"
liar, you just wanted to be with edward. with each word you spoke you could feel your voice grow higher with embarrassment, fuck, you definitely just made things awkward. you fidgeted with your fingers, gaining the courage to turn around and look at cam, his hair net was off now, letting his locs roam free, framing his face perfectly; you wonder what he'll say, maybe something mean, maybe nothing at all.

"that's cool, just tell me tomorrow if you still want me to drop you home."
his tone remained flat, you noticed his eyes flicking to ed and back to you, his face tensing up a little. strange.

"you should start walking now before it gets too late, dw bout closing tonight, i'll show you how to tomorrow"
you studied his body language for a little, his hand playing with the string of the apron the other holding the hair net. interesting, is he nervous? you shrug off whatever you strange thoughts you had in your head regaining focus back on ed.

now standing; he placed a few dollars on the counter, staring back at you he lends you a sweet smile and motioned you to come over to him. you smiled back, mouthing a quick 'one second'; you say farewell to cam, making sure to change clothes back to your regular ones, packing your work clothes in your bag before heading out. you took in your surroundings, thinking back to your childhood; the late night walks, seeing new things, being a young girl again with only pure intentions. ed lurks next to you: his head held high, glancing back and forth from you to the pathway, he fiddled with his fingers, he was nervous. you adjusted your posture, straightening your back trying to mirror his. turning your focus towards edward. one of you had to start the conversation, and it definitely wasn't gonna be him.

"so edward nashton"
he glanced up at you, eyes big and mouth straight.

"how has life been for you? do you have a job? a girlfriend?"
you nudge him softly, his face sparks a sort of 'deer in headlights' expression.

"hey even a boyfriend, i won't judge-"

"no, no nothing like that"
he retaliates, nudging/ pushing you back, you giggle a little at his reaction, noticing the pink tint on his cheeks.

"i haven't really gone out like that before.."
he adjusts his glasses, moving his hair out of his face. he looked so fucking fine: the slight breeze playing with his hair; not enough for him to look weird, just framing his face perfectly.

"i've just really been focusing on my career"

"and what career would that be?"
his face lights up in delight.

"i'm a forensic accountant"

"what do they do?"
he stares at you, fiddling with the bottom of his parker. you nudge his shoulder, smiling. he's exactly the same as when you first met him.

"yo-"
the sudden impact of your body onto a larger person caused you shut up, shut your eyes and shield yourself with your arms. you start blinking harshly looking over at ed, his eyes now widened, yours mirroring his when you see him. the unbearable smell of alcohol filled your senses; causing you to physically jerk back, you look up at the thing that shoved you. a man towered over the both of you, his face ominous.

"watch wherre you're fuckkign going girlly"
he words slurred together, bending down a little to stared into your eyes. who does he think he is talking to you like that?

"i..uh"
you stare into his eyes, feeling your face contort into a mixture of hurt and disgust, but you couldn't even form a sentence. your heart was pounding, breath quickening, you were frozen. you were a little girl again.

"i, i, i. you cannt even fuckign speak properly, whoores like you should stay on the side"
you feel your face scrunch up in anger, his mocking, his words, they all sounded too familiar. you could do nothing but stare, the overwhelming feeling of wanting to scream and cry in anger take over your body leaving you unable to do anything.

"i'm..sorry"
your voice on the verge of breaking. why? you thought you got over this, so why now? you clear your throat and grab edwards sleeve pushing past the situation, you can't handle nor will you allow yourself to be treated like this.

"did i say you could leave?"
your eyes widen. why did he sound like that? why are his words so clear? your eyes started overflowing, you started jogging now, dragging ed along with you. why did he sound like your father?

you couldn't break down here. not in front of him. after that incident you brushed the whole thing off, insisting to ed that you were fine. on the rest of the journey you reconnected finding out his hobbies and interests, sharing many. eventually making it to your door step.

"thanks for walking me ed"
you give a light smile, putting one hand in your bag and the other in your pocket, resting it on your phone.

"my pleasure, im sorry i didn't say anything back there, i-i know you said you didn't care but i know that i should've"
he pulled on his parker strings softly, eyes making full contact with yours. you pursed your lips, trying not to think about the situation again.

" it's ok ed. there was nothing you could've done"
you stared at him with an awkward smile. about to tell him fare well he embraced you, he was warm, big and smell like musk. you melted into his embrace, you'd never felt this kind of affection before, it wasn't forced, it was genuine care for you. he pulled away first, exchanged numbers with you and left.

you enter your apartment and sigh, no thoughts in your empty head,
you made your way to your bedroom looking around your plain living room, noticing a slights opened window. strange,  you closed them.

authors notes ( ' ▽ ' ):
it has been sooo long! did you miss me? idk if anyone will be reading this anymore since the batman phase has gone down, but i'm here still (๑>◡<๑)！！