Happy 2023.

Hello 2023

Again a New Year Eve..... Uff literally the third day in a row, but honestly today I don't wanna be a part of this Chain of Celebration Evening ...well one may think that I should step up for celebration afterall we all must celebrate life, but let's do it differently today, why be a part of the crowd of unknown strangers; it was just a Live Music Concert , besides I wonder how amazing it would have been being there ...

As you know me pretty well I am not that kind of a person who enjoy loneliness  but don't know why I don't feel like doing it today.

I know Manish already apologised for his behaviour last night, and honestly I am cool with it, afterall he is my fiance, we are soon going to be married; but somewhere I feel his words reverberating my ears .

But whatever he said,  it was not something unexpected to come from him, no matter how much I try but it's an arrange marriage.

I somehow always knew he is a reserved kind of a person, that he is not going to love me with all his heart too soon,
despite the fact that I Love him....

I can't expect him to be all sensitive towards me, But yet here I am mumbling to myself and quoting my feelings like this....

No point of regret now, afterall it's not only him who is making me feel like this, I think I am not strong enough to admit that it's a call from Veer.

I mean literally After 3 years of parting ways, saying goodbye and ending things like I was never a part of it he had the guts to call me again on New Year and how could he smile and say I am still single  and he misses me in his life....
Pathetic....!!

Not to forget it was just because his friends who thought I am a nerdy chic and would easily surrender to him ....
Fine I was a nerd in College, I never had any flings and was arrogant enough to maintain my dignity and He needed to justify his tag of a Playboy but does that give him the liberty to take my feelings for granted ....

I really thank God that I never fell for his words and I would never be able to thank him enough that he saved me from a dic*head but I am saying this now if you would have asked me the same question earlier my answer would have been different....
You know "Benefits of Doubts"..

Well sometimes I feel Manish is no different I mean Veer needed to prove he is a Playboy and he needs to prove I am Macho Man.... literally so sophisticated..
On the contrary I know how bad am I to try his patience always ...

But Yes Manish is a good human being, caring, sweet and a nice guy  I love the fact that he is strong enough to admit that Yes I am this kind of a person this is my nature and I need time to adjust....

I don't know what's the Perfect definition of Love or being in Love but for me it's all about togetherness...I mean there are millions who are ready to walk with you in the Course of life, but there are very few who are ready to wait for you.....
And when you find the one you must'nt wait to let him go.....
I really hope to find Love in Manish told Ya already I really love him a lot...