Voices of Conflict

The following story deals with subject matter containing some violence and psychotic actions. Viewer/reader discretion is advised.

Gone was the security Jimmy felt, gone was the organization that helped him feel normal and safe, gone were the regular meals, gone was the clean house, and gone was his desire to be better.

Jimmy Wayne stood in the shadows of the alley beside the dime store. A tall man with jeans that now hung loosely around his gaunt frame he shivered as the misting rain wet his uncombed hair. People milled about in the street protected from the mist by an array of brightly colored umbrellas mere feet from where he stood. He slipped further into the dark space.

Glancing from right to left looking for the source of the constant murmuring he longed for the security he once had. 'They can't get away with this.' He trembled. 'You have to make them pay.' He pushed back against the brick wall. 'They pretend to be good. They weren't good to her, Jimmy. They let her die.' His eyes closed tightly. His hands held firmly over his ears to shut them out, but they were inside and his hands couldn't block their torment.

"Hey get out of here," a grungy man called from the shadows at the end of the alley. "This is my place. Those people are mine to beg from. You need to find another place to roost." Jimmy moved closer to the man slowly curling his fingers around and gripping the pistol in his oversized jacket pocket. "I mean it mister. Go camp out somewhere else." Moving quickly like the jack rabbit his two older brother's had nicknamed him after, Jimmy was on top of the man swinging the butt of the pistol repeatedly quickly bashing in the man's skull silencing the bum before he could give away his hiding place.

Rising from the now quiet man Jimmy wiped his hand and the pistol on the dirty blankets and slipped it back into the pocket from which it came. He gently spread the now bloody blanket over the still form tucking him snugly in for his long sleep. Turning from the gruesome sight he returned to the vantage point he had found to stake out the hardware store across the street.

'They called you Jack Rabbit. That made you mad.' He shook his head to clear away the memories. 'Your parent's thought it was funny. They called you Jack.' His fist hit the rough bricks burning as skin tore away leaving scratches. 'Amber didn't call you that. She loved you even when you were nervous.' He smiled. 'She helped you. Those men let her die.' His shoulders sagged. His head leaned back against the wall. He closed his eyes. A single tear trickled down his cheek.

Amber had understood him. Jimmy slid down the wall crouching in the shadow his thoughts centered on his beloved wife. She had insisted he see the specialists. Jimmy wasn't stupid he knew things were different for him. He'd been a loner for so long. Until Amber that is. She had helped him to change. Amber was the love of his life.

Now she was gone.

He lowered his head into his trembling hands. It felt like it would explode with all the activity inside. He couldn't sleep. He forgot to bathe. He hadn't eaten in days. And now he waited in the shadows. Wanting to find the people the voices wanted him to hurt. He had to do it or they would never leave him alone. They were relentless in their tormenting, pushing him into a world of his own making, a world where everyone was watching him. He knew they were. They were hiding in the air vents, the sewers, around every corner. They were everywhere watching, always watching. He had to do it. He couldn't let them down. They would come for him. He knew it. He had to make the people that let his Amber die pay for their actions.

Then he saw it. The red fire department rescue squad pulled up across the street in front of the hardware store.

Jimmy didn't know if it was the ones he was looking for. He would have to wait and see. He inched forward to the edge of the shadows to get a better view. The driver of the squad got out and walked around the front of the truck. His hair was blond. Jimmy remembered that. This guy's hair was blond. It could be them. The number on the side was correct, but what about the other man? Jimmy waited to see if he was the one, the one who had ridden in the ambulance with his Amber.

He had been tall and thin. Fast, Jimmy remembered that the younger man had moved about really fast. His heart softened a bit thinking about the younger man. Jimmy thought the nervous energy the man exhibited reminded him of his own actions. Could the man have similar problems? If so maybe he could help the man like Amber had helped him. He could give the man medicine, his medicine and see if it calmed the man like it had calmed him. Yes, maybe that would be the thing to do instead of the ultimate thing the voices wanted him to do to make him pay. No if he helped him the voices would never cease.

Looking up from his thoughts Jimmy noticed the second man also had blond hair. It was the right vehicle, but not the right men. Slipping back into the shadows Jimmy decided he would have to set up another opportunity to find the men he sought on another day at a different time. His thoughts were already reeling in his complex mind working to formulate an alternative plan to find the firemen he was looking for.

Brian Cain climbed back in to the squad and called them in as available. His partner Kevin Masterson sat in the passenger seat complaining about false alarms in a way that was similar to his counterpart on the A-shift. "Man I can't believe we wasted all this time coming out here only to find out that no one here called. Who would have called in that a man was hurt just to have us run out here sirens blaring for nothing?"

"I don't know Kev. It could have been a bunch of kids that wanted to see our truck race by with lights and sirens. Don't worry about it. Let's get back to the station and that lunch that was almost ready." Brian pulled the squad back into traffic and headed towards the station.

Jimmy walked out of the alley unnoticed and disappeared down the street.