The illusion of closed eyes | Baji x Chifuyu

The illusion of closed eyes

Flashes of light constantly irritated my slightly closed eyes. Paradoxically, their predictability did not lessen the feeling of discomfort, the sensation that with each flash my body would completely stop tolerating them.

However, my body didn't react.

Sitting on the cool curb, my back was in contact with the rough surface of the old building's wall, while my hands, marked by many wounds, rested on the black material of my pants, covering my thighs. From the pocket of my hoodie, the sound of my phone's vibration reached me from time to time, while affecting my stomach, which was sensitive to any touch at the moment. The awareness that getting rid of the device, as annoying as a flashing streetlamp would make things a lot easier, was not enough to reach for it, to direct my hand there.

Stuck in almost total motionlessness, I desperately pushed away the thought of returning home. This dark alley where I found shelter tempted me to stay, luring me in with its repulsive aura. I felt safe here, confident that no one would enter my unfriendly space.

Or at least no one to whom my company would seem attractive, worth taking the risk.

– Hey! – a male voice with a pleasant warm tone reached me, clearly realizing how wrong I was.

Without honoring the intruder with any response, I sat with my eyes closed, expecting him to respect my obvious message and stop any attempts to make contact.

The sound of his voice reaching me once again made me realize my mistake.

– I hope you have a good explanation for this blatant ignorance.

Almost soundlessly, he moved toward me and deducing from the wave of heat that enveloped my exposed skin, came close enough for me to think that he had violated my personal space. If it weren't for the barrier that deprived me of eyewitness evidence of his actions, my body would have reacted in a way that was not necessarily pleasing to him.

Could it be that it was his lucky day?

If so, how long will I be forced to ignore my inner urge? Will I be able to ignore the curiosity that with each passing second, took away my confidence that I could handle it, that I would endure in my decision not to hurt this stranger, most likely innocent and not deserving of "punishment"?

– Leave – I said through clenched teeth.

Anyone in their right mind with at least a minimal instinct for self-preservation would let go and docilely follow my advice.

What's wrong with him? Why doesn't he react as I expected?

Wasn't it his lucky day after all?

– You've missed your chance – I said quietly, sure that he'd hear me because of the short distance between us.

The flickering light collided with the outer layer of my eyes as I lifted my eyelids and a still blurry image entered my mind. The flash of his dark eyes was the first thing my still dulled gaze registered. The increasingly clear contours of his face, which turned out to be much closer than I had initially assumed, marked the target to which my clenched fist was now aiming.

– So that's the chance you were mumbling about – he said, blocking my punch with remarkable precision.

His strong, long fingers wrapped around mine, holding my hand in an almost unbreakable grip. Growing irritation mixed with shock and disbelief, made the right hand follow the first one.

– And I thought I had no equal in terms of impulsiveness – he said calmly, efficiently capturing my speeding fist.

Stunned, I stared into his dark eyes, fully aware that in them lay the answers to the questions forming in my mind. For some unknown reason, the thought of leaving even one of them unanswered, made me frustrated.