Idk if i'm gonna promo this, if you see it great. You WILL cry, I know I will get messages so go ahead. Honestly I'd do the same because what I'm about to write will be more painful than the last.
***TRIGGER WARNING***
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As he thought about it, death didn't seem that bad. After all, he lost the only thing worth fighting for, Troye Sivan Mellet.
He looked around his apartment, running his hand on the kitchen counter. He made his way over to the couch, were they used to cuddle and watch documentaries repeatedly. He sighed to himself, wishing he could get those moments back, wanting to be in Troye's presence once more.
Connor made his way over to the the bedroom where the nightmares began, and where the two boys would hold each other when one got scared. He had, what seemed like, flash backs sometimes when he walked in the room. He would see them sleeping til noon, not wanting to leave one another. A single tear slid down the older boys face, facing the fact he couldn't wake up to a beautiful angel right in front of him.
He left the room heading to the spare room where he kept everything he could of Troye's. Walking in he sees the TRXYE ep hanging on the wall next to the more recent RXSK album. He knew Troye had been working on a few more songs, so he had rummaged around trying to find the cd that played sweet songs sung by his boyfriend. He quickly put it into the computer and started playing it, knowing the fans would've loved it which triggered something in his mind. He logged on to twitter and set a link up to those songs because that was the last joy Connor could give them.
Still in the room, he picked up the grey beanie that the shippers used to go crazy about. He put in on and went to the closet and picked out the all to familiar red sweater, he needed to be somewhat close him. He walked back into the kitchen and took out a pen and paper.
"Hi,
When your reading this I'll be gone...no not on vacation where you'll see me again in a week. I've never felt more alone this past year, even with the constant support of friends, family and fans. Troye was the only thing that kept me going. I loved him, I still do love him. I want to be with him now because the constant agony of not seeing him everyday kills me. So why not do it? I want my family to know how much I love them and their words of support really helped, at first. To the O2L boys who I have known for ever, I love you guys and I couldn't have picked better friends than you, even if I wanted to. Lastly to the fans who sent me inspiring messages, who still tweet me pictures of 'A Work In Progress', who tell me things will work out and I will become happy. Thank you. Love can make you do terrible things, and I some how got sucked into a black whole of Troye. My one final message is, love people but don't forget to love yourself and the fact that someone loves you even more. I love you, whoever you are, so much and can't imagine a world without you even if I'm not around to see it.
~ Connor Joel Franta"
He wrote. Tears were stained onto the paper but he didn't care. He grabbed his phone and searched for the O2L group chat.
"Hey guys it's Connor, I need all of you guys to come over to my apartment at 3 o'clock. No excuses." Sent......Delivered......Read
Connor went into the bathroom and pulled out the box of blades. He traced over the old scars and started making new patterns. His wrists were full of blood but needed to make one identify that'd be placed on his body forever. He washed his wrists getting the fresh blood off and watched it stain the white sink. He took the blade and calmly etched "TS" into his skin.
One last slash, and all the pain, all the suffering would go away. He looked at the clock, it read 2:37 pm, that was the time the hospital called. He cut deep into his skin, blood pouring out.
All he could see was a bright light, and a beautiful boy with his arm stretched out. Connor took it knowing he was home, finally. Troye saw the scars on his wrists, he gently kissed each one and promised no pain will ever hurt Connor again.
And then they walked hand in hand in an unknown universe of nothing but love.
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I'm sorry is anyone else crying in here??
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Ps. I'm sorry
