Keep To The Script (Complete)

~ Chapter 11 ~

"Of all the infuriating things," she mumbled as she ran into her room, closing the door behind her. "How dare he get pissed off at me for this when he was the one, who from the start, had been pushy and treating me in ways I didn't want to be treated!" With that, she flopped down on the bed, her eyes staring at the ceiling. Funny, it dawned on her that she had begun this night in just this same position, her thoughts floating around and around over him.

Was it even worth it for her to stay? At this point, she had been here one full day, and...she paused as she thought about that and shook her head. No, it wasn't even a full day. It was Thursday night, she still had a few more days left, and she wasn't sure she could avoid him, even given the size of the house. She groaned as she sat up and looked outside, eyeing the blackness. Here, there were no city lights so she could enjoy the evening sky for the beauty that it was. However, that bright ass moon was sure making that difficult.

"Is nothing going to go right?" she grumbled under her breath. With another groan, she flew open the window and then went in search of her laptop. Maybe she needed to drown herself in work. She had tons of emails to answer, and it seemed like she had a fan base to start responding to. Though she was published, she had told the company that she wanted to do a lot of hands-on stuff until it became too much, if it got to that point, it was.

"Okay, you got this Judith," she told herself, opening up her laptop. First, she opened her latest project, read the last chapter, then set her hands on the keys, and waited. She tapped on them, letting the thoughts tumble around before figuring out her next move, and frowned. Why was nothing coming to her mind? The next scene was supposed to be a huge fight scene and she was looking forward to working on it, but nothing was sticking out in her mind to say. That was so unlike her. She had been stuck in this one spot for a few days and she wanted to scream.

With a frustrated growl at her own mindset, she minimized that screen and opened her emails. At least that wouldn't require much thought process on her end, and she could just type away. She clicked on an email from her Editor, read it once, and then again, and almost threw her laptop against the wall as she realized that she had read it officially three times and hadn't been able to process one damn fucking word.

She sat the laptop down and then stood up, her hands on her hips. What was going on with her? She really couldn't be so far into her own damn thoughts over what happened that she couldn't focus on anything else. That was just beyond crazy to her. She started pacing, hoping that the movement would start to scatter the thoughts, but after a few moments, even that wasn't happening. With another frustrated, irradiated noise, she sat down on the window seat.

Okay, fine, since nothing else was distracting her enough and her mind seemed intent on thinking about this, she would. Was she in the wrong to get so upset at Angel? Probably. It wasn't like he called the press to meet them outside the place. And it wasn't like he wasn't trying to shield her from it. Which was funny, given the fact that it was she who was the senior here. But he tried hard to get her out of there as fast as he could, which was sweet.

She also really had no right to go off such a deep end with him, no matter what happened. He was trying to be a friend, and who was to say what could happen in the future? Maybe she blew up over something that she shouldn't have blown up over? Was this her guilty conscience talking, blocking her from doing anything so she'd go down there with her tail tucked between her legs?

At the same time, though, he was the cause of this. He was pushing her into corners that she wasn't ready to go in. Well, let's be honest, she wasn't ready to go there with HIM. She got back up and began to pace, hating how damn horrible she was sounding. Really, she was being a complete bitch and it wasn't fair to him. He was just trying to be a good guy. And the world could use a lot more of those.

And why, for fucks sake, was she turning that away? She forgot what good guys looked like and there was one that only wanted to do right by her, and she was being very rude. So, what if he was younger? Was age such a big factor? Maybe twenty years ago, but it sure wasn't now. Okay, so, maybe she was thinking long term and she had no right. It wasn't like she was going to give up her life completely back home and move out to LA, so why not enjoy the time she did have here?

Maybe that was the crux of her problems? Maybe she didn't want to hurt him because she knew she wasn't staying? Was that what could be driving her deep down and she was just choosing to focus on something else? While the thought was nice, she knew it wasn't the truth. Though it had some merit, it wasn't what was pushing her. No, this was simply her; and she really wasn't like that. That whole blow-up was on her, and she was in the wrong.

She walked back to the window and glanced outside, clearly making him out in the moonlight. She was worried, over little things really, and she didn't need to be. What she threw at him wasn't even true, at least she didn't think so. She was really a nobody in the Hollywood scene and a nobody in any type of writer's community. Besides, how many writers themselves posted pictures on their pages and their partner seemed younger, but they looked happy. No, this was a problem she was really going to have to fix, and she needed to start by going down there and talking to him.

In retrospect, he hadn't pushed her, he gave her room to back down or out, if she wanted. And he was trying to be a friend, even if he was letting her know his intentions. And really, come on, he was a gorgeous, gracious, humble man, would it really be all that wrong to show any interest in him? She watched as he finally got up and walked over to the calm waters, the waves barely washing up to his ankles. With a resigned sigh, she made her way out of the room, down the steps, and quietly out the back door. Eating humble pie wasn't her strong suit, she didn't much care for the taste, but in this, she was just going to have to suck it up and swallow every bite.

"Hey," he muttered, his back still turned to her. She was caught off guard that he had even heard her. Not that the waves were loud, but the peace and serenity of the water and the beach called to her enough to drown out everything. Well, maybe not, because it didn't work to ease her thoughts when she was trying to write, stupid thoughts and feelings.

"Hey," she said, walking up beside him.

"What brings you out?" She could lie and go crawl back up to the room and she could leave tomorrow, keeping a very big and huge wall up between them. But that didn't sit well with her. Her other option was apologizing and claiming how stupid she was, and she did want to give them a slow try, but that didn't appeal either.

"You," she told him, causing him to look at her. It wasn't what she wanted to come out of her mouth but guess the flow between brain and mouth wasn't working either. Or maybe it was, she just didn't want it to be.

"What about me?" He clearly looked confused, and she didn't blame him. Hell, she was apologizing, and she was confused!

"You were right." He lifted a brow, and she fought back her laugh. "Don't make me smack you."

"I'm sure those words were hard to say?" he questioned, a smile tugging at his lips.

"A little. Look, I am sorry, I was way out of line, and it wasn't you; none of this has been you. You've been a great guy and I just got my head into a position that was wrong and took it out on you." He nodded as he stepped over to her and took her hands again. Her eyes locked with his and she had to take a steadying breath from the look she saw blazing in those depths.

"We're still friends?" She wasn't sure she could voice she wanted more. Hell, she wasn't even sure she could head down that road. But there was something about his asking that she didn't like. Was it the fact that she didn't just want to be friends? Which was utterly stupid because she was just upstairs beating herself up over this. She licked her lips, and she watched as his eyes followed the movement and she couldn't fight the smirk.

"Hmm, friends," she started, causing his eyes to find hers once again, "on the road to maybe something more."