Out of all the days of your horrible existence...it was the day that life was being similar to having skill issues that you got a Karen.
"OMG WHAT DO YA MEAN I HAVE NO MAIDENS- BECAUSE I WANT A DISCOUNT THAT EXPIRED 100+ YEARS AGO??" the Karen screams in her girly pop voice that was similar to a whiny uwu 9 year old.
"Ma'am please le-" you try saying before she proceeds to talk over you.
"I WANT TO TALK TO YOUR MANAGER-" she finally says. Every Karen's ultimate card....
"*sighs* I am the manager. (is for sure the manager) NOW GET OUT-" you say as you literally grab the lady (disgrace to humankind) and through her out the door.
Later on while working, and surviving the major headache you got from Karen by a thread, John Doe appeared. Oh.
Gee.
T h a t s w e i r d .
*y o u l o o k n e r v o u s l y a t y o u r p e r s o n a l j o u r n a l t h a t w a s f i l l e d w i t h p i c s o f h i m*
o h .
BUT DON'T WORRY YOU'RE TOTALLY FINE WITH TALKING WITH HIM AND WHEN HE GREETS YOU YOU ACT AS IF YOU'RE NOT AN OBSESSED STALKER!!!
*Achievement unlocked! Is (kind of) normal!!*
Now time to sweep!! (read that in the broom from Baldi's voice)
"I doubt anything can go wrong-" you exclaim with a smile.
Secs later.....(I'm not even kidding about the secs part Maylee seriously just said....."Yeah lets make Y/N suffer in less than 10 secs!!")
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH OH GEE GOLLY GOSH- I'M SO SORRY- I'M LITERALLY PINNING YOU TO THE GROUND BECAUSE I FELL." you scream out loud as you literally rethink all of your life decisions and stand up. As well as helping Doe get up.
"OK NOW CIAO CAUSE SOMEONE DECIDED TO GO RESTROOM IN ONE OF THE ISLES!!" you say as you run to the backrooms (yes...the BACKROOMS)and have a breakdown.
After that you quickly recovered and went back out...
Oh wait.
My man just stole. OR DID HE???
*you enter a court with Doe*
*Maylee is the judge and I'm (me the writer) the witness*
AStaryRoseHE PAYED- WDYM..."DID HE JUST STEAL"-
Dec 23, 2022
Reply1Maylee_staWriterYOU HAVE TO SCAN THE ITEMS BEFORE PAYMENT BRO-
Dec 23, 2022
Reply2AStaryRose WE CAN SCAN THEM OURSELVES-
Dec 23, 2022
Reply1Maylee_staWriter WITH A SELF CHECK OUT U CAN. HE WAS AT A CASH REGISTER. HE NEEDS TO LET THE EMPLOYEE SCAN IT.
Dec 23, 2022
ReplyAStaryRose IK BUT ALL ITEMS HAVE THE SAME BARCODE SO WE CAN JUST GET AN ITEM AND SCAN IT OURSELVES- oh but we don't know what he got
Dec 23, 2022
Reply1Maylee_staWriter I'm done arguing at this point 🥲
Dec 23, 2022
Reply1AStaryRose WHAT- fine...I still stand my point.
Dec 23, 2022
Reply
*@Nagitokomaedascum speaks up*
NagitokomaedascumThis argument just made me burst out laughing, also I'm pretty sure that the cashier can go into the system and see what is scanned
Jan 10
Reply
*case is closed*
Now you were walking home. And found...WAIT IS THAT PIKACHU-
"It's a hairball WITH AN EYE!"
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO"
*picks hairball up*
"aw you're a cute little thing- but yeah I can't keep yo- oh." you say as the hairball gives you puppy eye.
"Fine, You're my friend now we're having soft tacos later!!!" you say after rejecting him another time and then giving in.
But wait- DRAMA
If you knew that he actually was a uh....uh.....CAUSES LOSS OF MAIDENS- WOULD YOU HAVE TAKEN HIM IN????
YOU ARE READING
An Cannibal Doeth From the 17th Century (PARODY)
FanfictionY/N IS A PHSYCOTIC STALKER WHEN IT COME TO BBG "John Doe" SINCE THE 1TH CENTURY. HE COMES INTO YOUR GAS STATION WITH HIS PUFFED OUT CHEST SO HE CAN HAVE RIZZ. One day....YOU FIND A POKEMON- I MEAN- LITTLE DOE AND DRAMA. NOTE: This story does no...
