The Pace Of My Heart

Prologue

Prologue

I'm still trying to take it all in everything, How do you react to something like that? Maybe I should tell you what happened first and introduce myself.

My name is Hope Elizabeth Taylor I'm nineteen, I live with my brother Burton who is 23 and his 2 friends Chad and Ian who are also 23 they have known each other since they were babies. Ok where was I..... Ah yes.....................

 It was a nice hot sunny day when I collapsed in the backyard of my house, all of my brothers friends were over for a barbeque and having fun laughing and goofing around as usual. I took a massive pain in my chest at first I thought it was the burger I ate my brother Burton isn't the best cook but I don't blame him, our parents died that's all I know Burton won't tell me how they died but they died when I was ten leaving Burt to look after me. The pain got stronger and I collapsed to the ground going in and out of conscious.

I opened my eyes to a man wearing green he smiles at me but I know by my brother's face something is very wrong. He smiles at me not his normal smile I know it's forced it's a show for me.

"Hope" he comes over to me I can see the tears in his eyes but he is trying his hardest to be strong for me.

"What's wrong?"

"Hello Hope my name is Doctor Evan's, do you remember what happened?"

"I fainted" he nods his head and I look back at my brothers dead eyes I have only ever seen those dead eyes twice and that was when he told me our parents died and Marcy died his fiancée. My brother tried his best to be strong for everyone most of all me but I always heard the screaming and his tears at night. I used to crawl into his bed and cuddle into his warmth my brother is always warm.

"Hope you have a very weak heart you need a heart transplant without the transplant you may only have a year or a few months"

My brother winces and I do nothing but stare at the same spot on the ground the doctor leaves the room probably trying to give me time to get used to the news and let it sink in.

"Hope it will be OK you will be fine, you'll get a new heart and be as good as new" Burt tells me with a fake smile

I don't tell him but I don't want a new heart I want my heart. I know something the doctor didn't tell me the chances of getting a heart that reacts with my body is very slim. Burton doesn't want to admit it but my chances of survival are very low. I'm going to die that much I know but I can't do this to Burt not again he has already went through enough. Not only has he lost mum and dad he lost his fiancée Marcy as well he won't tell me how she died either. I don't know why maybe it's too gruesome and he doesn't want to scare me.

"Hope, get some rest I'm going to talk to Chad and Ian they're so worried about you"

He gives me a gentle kiss on my forehead and then leaves the room. I put a hand on the place where my heart is and feel the steady beat it's faint but it's still beating. I know that means I'm dying even if Burt tries to deny it I'm nineteen and there is still so much I want to do in my life and one place I really want to see before I die Canada, I don't know why but I have always loved the country and it's always been my dream to see it for myself.

I sit up and look around the room for a clock finally I find one near the door six o clock, the barbeque started at four so I have been unconscious for nearly two hours. I look at the door and make sure no one is going to come in, I pull the IV out of my arm and slowly lower my feet to the ground looking straight towards the door. I look down and check out what I'm wearing ... still in my jeans and pink chequered shirt so that means it will be far easier to get out of here.

I open the door quietly trying not to make a sound and sneak out into the waiting room and see my brother nearly broken Chad is talking to him trying to calm him down, Chad is like a big brother to me he always helped Burt watch me when I was little and Ian did the same they were always very protective of me always keeping the boys away. Burt is always wary of when Ian is around me now he always tries to touch me, hold my hand and he even tried to kiss me but my brother caught him and tackled him to the ground let's just say he didn't try that again. Chad got in on the action too but he didn't do much as Ian is his younger twin by three minutes and if Ian steps out of line Chad is quickly reminds him that he is older and Ian hates it, he does it all the time even in front of the girls and they just laugh and call them cute (which they are).

I look around the room for Ian and find him standing beside the window staring out into the horizon looking down below. I turn away from the scene and run out the entrance of the hospital into the cool evening air it's only five minutes to our house through the forest entrance, the hospital has always been behind our back yard it has always been that way and I have never questioned it.

I slow down for the sake of not putting too much stress and pressure on my heart. My feet hit the grass and I can see my neighbours watching me as I make my way to the garage and grab my car keys. I know they are probably calling Burt to tell him they saw me, it's weird everyone is terrified of my brother and his two friends and the only one who isn't Marcy's little sister Millie. It's a good thing I keep clothes and money in my car for emergencies. I get into my beat up old red car and drive away leaving everything

Leaving my brother

Leaving my home

Leaving my life

Leaving without saying goodbye

I'm leaving to start my death

I'm leaving to spare everyone the pain

I'm leaving to fulfil my last dying wish

I'm leaving to go to Canada