Heartstopper 1- College...

Chapter 1- 10 days

NICK

"im just so scared!" charlie shouts
it had been going on and on like that for the last few days now, i was going to college in 10 days now and everything started to feel so real.
Me, my mum, and charlie had been out bying all sorts of stuff for my college dorm and charlie was so anxious because i was going away.
i had started packing 5 days ago and even though charlie tried to hide it, i could see he hated every minute of him helping me pack.

"im sorry charlie but you know i cant just stay home with you" i said "i have to go to college" he looked at me with tears in his eyes "i know... i just wish i could go with you or something" he said.
i was quiet for a few seconds, i didnt know what to say.

"Charlie... you know i love you so much and i just need you to trust me on this. its gonna work out, i will make sure of that"
he looks up at me "i know... im sorry"
"you have nothing to apologize for" i say as i give him a hug

the rest of the day we just stay in my bed, watching netflix and cuddling. i know i will have better time to pack when charlie has gotten home.
Charlie has fallen asleep on my chest, its only 5pm but he must be tired. i know his mum will be here soon because charlie got a notification while he was sleeping so i just had to check.
i feel kinda bad for making charlies mental health worse right now but i dont know what i can do else than reasure him that it will be fine. its not like i could just not go to college, i have to keep going even though charlie is a year behind me. i am really worried about if he will be okay at school after i leave but he has Tao, Elle and Aled and i know they will to their best to keep his mood up but i also know it will be hard on him in the beginning.
Allthough im worried im also just so ecxited about finally going to college and getting new friends and try new stuff.

Charlies mum has been here now to pick him up. When i said goodbye to him he was very groogy and was wearing one of my hoodies. He looked so cute like that but to be honest all i could think about was getting back to packing.
My mum had been such i nice help the last few days and i know she will miss me but its just so nice to have someone so close to you who is generally ecxited for you. i know charlie will be happy for me too, he just needs to get used to it.
My whole room is a mess right now, i have clothes everywhere and im still trying to figure out what to take with me, leave at home, and donate. My mum thinks i have way too much clothing and i barely wear any of it because its too small but i just hate getting rid of old things.
In the end i had my mum help me decide for a few things i should donate but the rest is still staying. for now.
Its late now and i deffinetly should be sleeping but i just cant. after dinner i got a message from my new college writing something about how important is was to make new friends and not just hang out with the ones you already know and stuff like that. so i got a few socials of the guys that im going with and i already know its gonna be so good at college but im still scared.
Sometimes i overthink going to college and i get kinda scared, and i just feel so alone with my feelings when i get scared like that bacause i know i wouldnt be able to tell charlie about it. But i know its gonna be fine and i wont regret it.