"Zayn? Do you really have to leave again?" I ask Zayn as he hands his bags to the flight attendant. "It's okay, Ash. We can talk on the phone and text. Then when I come back home from the tour we can have some time together. Just the two of us best friends." He says smiling. His statement should have made me happy but it actually made me sad. I hate the word 'friends'. Whenever I hear Zayn speak that ugly word it feels like someone is sticking pins in my heart. I don't even understand why I still feel this way. Zayn has caused me so much pain yet I still want to be his girlfriend. I still want us to be more than friends.
"Okay, Zayn. Just promise me you'll call every day at least once." I ask of him, hands laid on his shoulders. He let's out a laugh and tilts his head up. His laugh is so genuine and happy I just want to laugh along with him. "I'll try, Ash." He says with a grin. "I'll make sure to check in on you ev-" "Hey Zayn baby. Are you done with your bags?" Perrie interrupts, not so gently removing my hands from Zayn's shoulders. She clings to him while stepping on my foot a bit harder than someone would on accident. "Yeah, baby. Ashley and I were just saying good-" Perrie cuts off his sentence after reaching up and smashing her lips on his. I know she enjoys it from the evil smile she shows during each kiss. Zayn started making grunting noises as he wrapped his arms around Perrie's hips, the same way he had to me yesterday. They turn positions so that Perrie was facing me. As they took a break she looked at me with a smirk. "Come on baby, we should go somewhere private. Then we can do more than just kiss." She steals another kiss from his lips and tugs on his collar. "I like the sound of that." Zayn says, returning the naughty smirk. He turns around to say good bye when Perrie drags him away off onto the plane. She giggles after pushing him onto the plane. She turns to me while unbuttoning her shirt and winks.
'Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?' I ask myself. Why does she love torturing me? Why does she hate me so much? I just wanted to light myself on fire, jump off a building, get hit by a car, and cry until all of the fluid in my body is gone. But I stand there and do nothing. My face is devoid of emotion as I stare at the jet plane. A security guard turns to me and asks me to leave as the plane turns its engines on. The guard is trying to tell me to back away but I hear nothing. I feel no emotions, I cannot hear. I don't want to see. I don't want to live like this.
As I watch the plane take off, my hair whipping my face, a question comes to my mind. 'What happened to that boy trying out for the X-Factor, the one who was scared and looked to me for confidence?' My emotionless daze wears off and the emotions come flooding in. A tear slips down my cheek as I watch the plane disappear into the clouds, along with any chance I had with recovering the friendship between Zayn and I. In that moment I realize I will never be more than just his friend.
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Forgotten
FanfictionZayn and I have always been best friends. We've been through everything together: School, Prom, X-Factor... I was there when he needed my help. I gave him strength through the audition, through the first photo shoot, through that first nervous conce...