Veracity

The Plan

The plan was simple. Take a airsoft pistol to school just to scare them. I was beaten so why would I get in trouble?
       I did my normal morning routine. Brush my hair, brush my teeth, get dressed, and set out for school. Only on this day I packed my plastic airsoft pistol, that I spray painted 2 days prior, right behind my biology book.
      Immediately upon arriving to the curb of school the principal called my name and asked me to speak with him in his office. I followed, hands trembling with sweat beading down my forehead. I'm his office was a local police officer. They wanted me to fill out a report and to identify the assailants, but I refused. I told them," if I press charges and tell on them it will only make my situation worse." With the promises of protection and special attention to me, they pushed and prodded for one name at least. But I refused. The principal let me know that he's there for me and let me go to class.
     Now the plan I had made was thrown off guard because I was notified of the removal of Josh and his 2 buddy's, from gym class. The school knew who did it but did nothing about it. I had to come up with a new plan. I had second period with 2 of their girlfriends. So let's scare them and make them fear for they boyfriends lives.
      I sat in my seat in the back of the classroom of second period and waited. Ashlyn and Kimmy sat down and all I had to do was come up with a discreet way of showing the gun and getting my point across.
       I placed the gun under my book and wrote a note to the both of them. It read

     " dear scum,
             Last week you're boyfriends needed a good laugh, so I gave them one. While minding my business I was stuck in the head by Josh with a padlock and beaten. I was later locked into my locker with blood all over me. And my clothes thrown in the toilet. I'm offering you a chance to live I have fun under this book. You tell them if they fuck with me one more time. I will blow their fucking brains all over the pavement while you 2 watch. When I'm down murdering and dismembering them while you 2 watch. I will shoot you both. "
       Upon reading it together both Ashlyn and Kimmy got up and yelled he has a gun. I have never seen a room clear faster in my life. I sat there staring at my desk, waiting. I waited for 5 minutes until my teacher threatened to kill me with his years of experience in martial arts. I told him, " you don't have to worry it's not a real gun" I handed him the gun and waited for police to arrive. The teacher asked, " why?"
     All I could mutter was, " an eye for an eye".
Everyone understood why I did what I did. But no one understood why I didn't just get help when it was offered. It's hard to explain but when wrong is done to me it only feels write to do the same back. I'm not a violent or harmful person. I only caused self inflicted pain.
       But how much bullshit does one person have to take before a much more serious situation arises. I mean I was bullied and everyone knew I was. I was alone all the time. For lunch, for group projects, even in P.E. At the age of 14 until I was 18 I couldn't live with it anymore. After I was expelled from that school I did home schooling. They introduced laptops for students and I just stayed in my room. I got my work done but never socialized. I felt it was better.