Sometimes I wonder if an apocalyptic world would be better, then I realise we are already in one.
We use the online world to escape from the real world, the real world to escape from the online world, when both worlds are as fucked up as each other.
I wonder why I'm scared to leave the house then I remember the stories of rapists and murderers and torture devices but is the real torture device the one in my hand? The one that feeds me these endless messages of danger then leaves me defenceless living in a shell of who I used to be.
Every escape route is a dead end looping back into the cycle of insecurity and fear. The real world is full of danger but the same dangers are online and we must be aware of every single one of them. We grow up scared of the very thing that allowed us to be here in the first place. We are scared of our world but we must not show vulnerability because weakness leads to exploitation.
My head is full of how many things can go wrong in my life time but I can not name a single thing that I am taught to do right.
