Ryder Lockwood was on his own for 5 months before finding Alexandria. He finally felt safe again. This all changed when a new group arrived in Alexandria. Will he be able to make peace again after Alexandria falls. Will he find a family within the g...
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Ryder Lockwood hated many things. He hated early mornings and the way the birds sang. He hated burnt toast and the way Carl Grimes' hair fell just the right way, it made him dizzy. But most of all, he hated grief.
He hated the way it made him feel. The way that every time he closes his eyes, he sees Negan's bat smash Glenn's head. He seen the hopeless and broken look in Maggie's eyes. He hated the way he wanted to through up every single time the scene plays out in his head.
Ryder was too occupied with his thoughts to notice the knock on the door or the weight shift on his bed.
"Ryder," a voice calls out, concerned. Ryder jumped, startled by the sudden sound. He looked over to see fluffy brown hair and a cowboy at on the suspects head.
"Carl," he responded casually, trying not to give away the previous thoughts. Something in his tone or eyes must have given it away because Carl gave a strangled sigh.
"I've known Glenn sense I was eleven years old," Carl choked out. "He helped me after my mother died. He was such a good guy," He finished, tears brimming his eyes. Ryder didn't think about how close they were before. Without thinking, Ryder reached out, grabbing Carls hand.
"Carl, I'm so sorry," Ryder said, trying to comfort the younger Grimes in any way he could. "I just," Ryder stutters, trying to think of a way to say it. "Every time I close my eyes, I see him," Ryder finally gets out, relief flooding his system after being able to get it out.
"Negan?" The brown haired boy question, the name Carls lips tastes like poison.
"Yea, I just, I see the way he was mocking Abraham and Glenn while they were dying and it's not fair," He said, the confession spilling out of my lips before he could stop them.
"Yea, I know what you mean. I just, I want to kill him. I know it's a bad thing to say but I hate him, he makes me so angry," Carl sighs, "He almost cut off my fucking arm man, I was terrified. Out here, that's a liability,"
"I know, I'm just glad your safe man," Ryder says reassuringly.
In that moment, all the worries and fears faded from Carls head, replaced with thoughts of Ryder and how safe he felt with him. In this world full of monsters, human and not, that is all that matters.
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"Hey, have you guys seen Carl? I haven't seen him in awhile," Ryders voice calls out amongst the busy people of Alexandria but mostly directed to Enzo.
"No, sorry Ryder, I last saw him yesterday," the golden haired boy replied. At those words, worry etched at Ryder's features. The last time he seen Carl he was set on some revenge plan to kill Negan, he didn't think Carl was being serious
