have you ever wondered whats the view beyond the lenses? although im singing my heart out to someone who could save me from myself, i find it rather disheartening. i could only see the admiration, the thrill in the eyes of those who heard me. i coul...
i woke up a bit disoriented. i admit ive seen parts of that dream way before then but it seems like my brain arranged themselves chronogically to follow a steady plot. as much as i want to really remember my past consciously, glimpses was all i could ever recall but now, even though its just a bit, i now knew my mothers face. even if i want tears to flow from my eyes, it doesnt. rather than feeling sorrow since i saw how my mother died, i felt more thankful somehow. i knew i wasnt thrown away. i knew i wasnt unwanted. my mother loved me. she wished for my happiness and im very much obliged to comply especially now that i have arius by my side, who is loving me more than i ever deserved.
todays the day arius will accompany me on my private fanmeet here at a mall cinema. the mall is privately own by the family so coordination was easy to handle and security is easy to manage. we are to enter through the vip walkway. apparently this was only used by the family everytime there are scheduled appointments or what-so-ever in the mall where they are badly needed or need in attendance.
"are you ready?" arius looked at me fondly while walking the halls of the mall. the kind of stare that was only for me. the caress he made on our intertwined hand was so reassuring, i drifted a bit.
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"ready as ill ever be."
"you should. youve been practicing non-stop this past month and its heartbreaking everytime i see you passed out in the living room whenever you come home."
"im sorry."
"dont be love. i know youll give it all whenever your talent was needed and i dont see anything to be apologizing for. im just so proud that my mate is out of this world talented and beautiful." he kissed my head unaware of the stares we gained from the surrounding security and staffs.
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"you think so?"
"i do so. dont be nervous and have fun, okay? ill just be in the dressing room or somewhere watching you." i smiled widely at him. how can he be more supportive than this? hes the standard. no. hes the best.
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