Where did you go? (Kikasa)

6.

Trigger warning!

-Implied suicide

-Panick attack

(Kasamatsu's POV)

I woke up 

I decided to go to school, even though I was extremly tired and worried, and would have preferred to just stay at home in my bed all day, I just couldn't let my team down.

I got dressed, went down the stairs, took out a piece of bread from the freezer and toasted it. I put on some butter and ate about a third of it before I started to feel nausous and went to brush my teeth.

I brought some flowers with me on my way to school. I was going visit my grandmas graves before school started. When I was worried about something before she would always listen to me and give me advice on what to do, so im going to visit her grave and hopefully be able to figure out what is the best thing to in this situation.

As I made my way outside, the sky was clear. I could hear the wind blowing through the leaves and the birds chirping but it still felt awfully quiet for some reason.

'I wonder how everyone else is doing. All this time I have been so worried about Kise I haven't even had time to think about how the others might feel. I wonder if they're also this worried? Either way, now that one of our team members, no, friends are gone, its more important than ever that we stay together'

As I walked by the side of the road I could see friends hanging out and walking to school together. By everyone I saw, chatting together, hanging out, having fun I couldn't help but feel a bit alone and abandoned.

As I walked to school, earlier than usual since now there wasn't really any reason to go as late as I usually do, I went the opposite way after a bit, heading to the graveyard instead of the school.

Flowers in my hands I walked past the tombstones, reading the names as I passed by, looking for my grandmas.

As I passed by I saw something that I will never forget.

"In loving memory of Kise Ryota

The sun shined brighter when he was here"

I couldn't belive what I was seeing. I dropped the flowers in shock as my mind began to think about everything that had happened.

'I should had known something was wrong from the start. I should have done something, anything, right when I noticed he started acting odd. If I had just payed more attention- If I had just been there for him, maybe this- whatever has happened that made it end like this, wouldn't had happened.'

My vision started go blurry and I struggled to breath as started thinking about everything.

'He was always there for everyone. He was always there to lighten the mood- to make everyone happy. He was our friend, and now he's gone, forever. He may have been a bit annoying at times, but he none the less was our friend. So many people looked up to him. And now he's gone. Maybe if I had payd a bit more attention and been there for him more he would still be here- but its to late for that now. He's gone, and nothing I do can change that fact. Nothing I can do to take him back. And I will have to live with that guilt for the rest of my life.'

It felt like I was gonna throw up. I couldn't breath as my vision started to get blurrier.

And then everything went black.

(A/N) The final chapter is finally here! This wasn't what I originally had planned as the end, but this made it a lot easier to round of. This will probably be the last chapter to this. Also, 555 words not including the a/n! This has been pretty fun to write and I look forward to writing more in the future! Though for one of my first fanfictions, I don't think this turned out all to bad! Also, if anyone has any ideas on what I should write feel free to leave them in the comments. Thank you so much for reading!!!