chris sturniolo imagines<3

losing my everything

chris rubs my back up and down as i try to silently cry. my ears slightly ring from the silence, but it eventually goes away as my silent cry turns into loud sobs so there is no more silence to fill up his room thats dark and only lit up by the barely bright sad sky. as if the universe heard my cries, it rains heavily and its a gloomy day, like it has the same emotions as me.
just a 15 minutes ago chris had invited me over to
talk since we had been arguing more recently. i already knew he would say what i was thinking but i still had a bit of hope the talk would be about us fixing our now over relationship so we could go back to normal. we had been fighting about the fact we hadn't been spending time with each other and we had been very distant. we just weren't connecting with each other, the spark between us was gone.

"please forgive me, i'm really sorry but i don't want to keep hurting u, i can't stand the fact that i'm going to hurt u but i have to do this. i'm breaking up with u, i'll always love u and look out for u and i wish it didn't have to be like this but we keep bringing each other down and we both know it's better for us to not be with each other than be together and be unhappy." chris said, it felt like my whole world came crashing down.

"i really love u, and i know u do too. but i really wish we could've worked it out at least. but i know we'd only continue having problem-" i was trying not to cry as i was speaking but i couldn't help it. chris embraced me in his arms and ever so slightly whispered "i'm really sorry."

we'd stayed like that for a few minutes. me sobbing in his arms and him trying to make me feel better by whispering apologies and how he still loves me and how he always will. i stopped sobbing eventually but i still had tears dripping down my face, but this time my cried were silent again.

i pulled myself out of his warm embrace and tried my best to speak and hold my tears in. "i should go, don't want to stay out late. its already dark." i mumbled and kept my head down, trying to avoid of the eyes i would always love to stare at. "goodnight chris." as soon as the words came out of my mouth i left, chris running after me but i ran downstairs, opened the door and ran out to the street, far enough so he wouldn't see me and try to stop chasing me as there was no point.

i was finally outside, i could cry as loud as i want and let all my emotions out without having the boy i love right in front of me. the rain made me soaking wet as i walked home crying, since i was dumb enough to walk. this had to be the worst day yet. this was the end of me and him, i was losing everything.

losing my everything.