Counting the seconds | Addison Montgomery x freader

Chapter 2: Minutes

You looked up from your dry food and saw Meredith walking up to you with a smirk on her face. You hoped you would have a calm minute after all the test you had to run after you managed to flee from your little walk. As Meredith sat down she looked like a teenage girl about to talk about some gossip.

„What was that about?" she asked you leaning forward and looking at you exited. "What are you talking about?" you mumbled but you knew exactly what she was talking about. She huffed and looked across the room, searching for something or someone. As she found it she looked back at you and smiled suspiciously. „Seriously, why did you run away earlier??" she questioned you. You wished you knew. Addison made you nervous, like really nervous.

„I had to go, you know making tests and stuff like that" you replied after staying quiet for a while. „Yeahhh, is it possible that you got nervous?" she assumed in a high pitched voice making you groan. „Why would I ?" You almost shouted. She just sat there chuckling and shaking her head. „Why wouldn't you?" she asked as if it was obvious. You scoffed looking back at your full plate taking a bite.

Meredith always liked to tease you. So as she didn't stopped, you could just roll your eyes at her over and over. She looked really excited talking about you and Addison. You didn't knew why and didn't want to know. But as she started waving someone over, she got your full attention. You almost spilled your juice as you saw who was walking over to you two now. It was no other woman then Addison.

She looked stunning. Her Hair surrounded her beautiful soft looking face. And you felt nervous all over again. You couldn't risk Meredith teasing you in front of her. So you told Mer you had to go and quickly left the cafeteria. Your full tray was still standing there, like the two women who looked at the door you just walked through.

You didn't dared to look back and made a straight line to your room. Of course you felt bad for fleeing from the woman twice. She must think you have a problem with her. Well you have one but you couldn't possibly tell her that she makes you nervous.

****

You felt the cold sheets on your skin as you looked up from your bed. It was quite inside your head and you enjoyed laying there, in the middle of life and death. You were existing in a world, you would simply stop existing after your heart failed or at least when you're buried deep in the ground. You liked playing with those thoughts as the minutes were slipping away like sand on bars.

Eventually, you decided to let your eyes rest. You tried to take in your surroundings with closed eyes and you could swear someone came into your room. The smell of coffee and something you couldn't describe invaded your nose. You really liked the smell, it made you feel like a summer morning. Like one of the moments where the sun is caressing your skin.

„Seems like you don't really like me."said the familiar voice . The sound was floating and running down your throat like honey. You slowly opened your, feeling oddly relaxed by the smell and the slight raspy voice. Your eyes adjusted to the light and you were met with greyish blue eyes. They were calm and robbed your speech. You followed her nose to her lips and imagined to trace a line on her face. Letting your fingers travel trough her hair and your eyes getting lost in hers.

You snapped out of your trance as she snapped her fingers in front of your face. She smiled as you quickly sat up and looked like a startled bambi. „Are you alright?" she asked and lowered her voice to not startle you again. Just now you noticed that she was sitting at your bed, her hands resting on her knees as she looked at you concerned. „Addison." you breathed out like you didn't noticed her before.

„That's my name." she whispered, chuckling at your perplexed state. She stood up and grabbed something. You looked at her as she offered you a glass water, realising how idiotic you must look, you grabbed the water immediately. You took a view sips and cleared your throat. „Thanks" you uttered avoiding her eyes, instead looking at your hands.

She sat back down and it was quite for a few moments, you wouldn't call it awkward but you also didn't enjoyed the pause. „Why are you avoiding me? We don't even know each other." she asked searching your eyes. You started playing with your hands, stressed about telling her the truth or lying. Because of a stupid, unknown reason you just couldn't lie to her, you didn't want to. „I was nervous, I don't know why." you mumbled looking back up, meeting her soft gaze.

„So you just left." she remarked amused , trying not to laugh. You couldn't help but laugh with her, she made you awfully relaxed. „Yeah, I did." you affirmed smiling to your self. She looked at you with a grin and playfully shook her head at you. „Do me a favour and don't run next time."she whispered , leaning forward before she stood up and left. You couldn't help but look after her, taking in her tall figure as she walked out your door. She was truly beautiful. You thought about having her as your friend, having her near you. Being able to look at her whenever you want.
****
„Tell me Y/n, is there a secret lover you haven't told us about." Arizona asked excited , looking at you. She sat on the couch with Amelia. On the opposite sat Meredith, her legs over yours, all three women now looking at you. There wasn't for a long time actually, you dated a few men here and there and had a boyfriend once, but you never really felt anything for them. „No, there isn't."you responded shrugging, looking down at your now folded hands. As you looked up, all three women looked at you surprised. Like you just told them the world is going to end.

„Why?" Mer asked stunned, still looking at you like the other two women. „I don't know, I dated a few times but I never felt attraction or anything to one of them. Maybe I haven't met the right one jet." you explained, not knowing what else to say. Arizona suddenly started smiling knowingly, looking at you with kind eyes. Confused why, you sat up looking back at her muddled. "What?" you questioned her, leaning forward.

„But you got laid, right?" Mer asked. You almost choked looking if she was serious. She was. „I did." you paused „once." Now everyone was clearly shocked of the new information. It was a long time ago but you had sex once. It wasn't good, not in the slightest. Back then your boyfriend always pressured you and when you finally gave in, you regretted it immediately. The good thing was, it was over before it started, he came and pulled out. After that you ended it a few days later.

„Let me guess. You didn't enjoyed it, not one bit?" Arizona figured. You nodded not feeling the need to probably answer to that. Suddenly it was quite, as a question was thrown in the room.

„Do you like women?"