Lucky Love: White Wild Rose

Scars too deep

Luckily fate was somewhat in June's favor, still, harm was already created, June didn't have to go to school and see that stupid jerk boy who broke her heart. It was summer break after all, and she would try to find things to occupy herself so her mind wouldn't wander off to think about Lucas, and picture him with Anne on the bleachers with him that day, it was something that was stuck to her brain. She would sometimes think of the good times they had, during picnics and such but that wouldn't last long because there would be a flash of the evil Anne that would appear, it was like a horror movie to June, a never ending horror movie and she hated, disliked, despised, horror, just anything scary; insects too really. It was not easy since it was her first real relationship and all but because of the fact she also didn't see it coming. Later her brothers came home, they stayed until school was officially over while June went out only about a quarter of the day in. A week flew past with June barely doing anything, she occasionally went and played at the beach, because her house was almost like a beach house, but they actually lived here, so they would play at the beach really often. In the past week, June wrote and read several books, wrote books to cope with her emotions and read books to get inspiration. She had tons of books she has yet to read and with her cream-colored room with furry carpets, comfortable chairs and a sofa, and a soft bed with some entertainment such as iPhone, iPad, computer and a TV she was fine, or so she thought, and so did everyone else. The books help her a lot she read and read creating her own little world of imagination inside her mind, she wanted to be distracted, no, she needed to be.

Unlike all the crushes she has had and all the people she talked to during her elementary, middle school and the little part of the start of high school, this was the most painful by far, or so, 2nd place the 1st was someone else, so dear to her that she got sick from all the misery that followed, that was probably one of the top miserable moments of her life. This time she stayed in her room and listened to sad songs and watched sad movies as well as read sad books. She felt as if the ground beneath her slipped. It was as if she had a void in her heart and was falling into one herself, things were not looking good. The dreams she had were all heartbreaking, it was a repeated loop, it made her not want to sleep, but with all the tiredness she couldn't help it. The dreams were repeating or either continuing, it was the joyful moments of them being together for a split second, and then it would all turn cursed. It would suddenly be the "bleachers scene" all over again and it traumatized her. She would wake up in the middle of the night from all the horror in her dreams, it was too much for her to handle.

She couldn't help but feel the pain that followed after a breakup, a breakup where nothing was wrong. Lucas was still in her heart, but... 'Why did he pick someone else... when he was in love with me and what bet did he make with Anne to make it turn out this way?' She had to get to the bottom of it, but right now she didn't have the mood to do anything. With each passing day, the pain grows, creating a void in her heart, deeper and deeper it goes. Each day she would lie on her bed thinking if things would turn out differently, but she couldn't turn back time. With every love song, every love story, every love thing she ever read or listened or dreamt about was starting to seem like a lie, she now knew that giving her heart to someone was a mistake and that she shouldn't have done it in the first place. One day not long after summer break she couldn't take it anymore, she just couldn't and bawled on the cold, stone floor in one of the extra rooms for storage. The tears seemed to burn her cheeks with every second, with every run down, with every tear, it was not getting better. She didn't imagine that she would be feeling this much just from a breakup, but it was still the most real relationship she ever had and it ended worse and quicker than she thought. She didn't like this feeling at all and wouldn't ever want to experience it again, it was not her cup of tea.

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! She heard something. KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! There it was again. KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! It was a subtle knock. Nobody was home since June's mom took June's brothers to go buy some stuff, 'Right, nobody is here'. June took her time and barely had the energy to get up and walk to the door. "Who is it?" June asked as she was unlocking the door, nobody answered, she was now a bit alerted, 'Why didn't nobody answer', she was now curious too. As June carefully opened the door, she looked up and couldn't believe who was standing there looming over her, she almost fell back at the sight that there was a boy in front of her, the boy who broke her heart with that awful memory that kept playing in her head. He brought back bad memories from the bleachers too, from the bleacher being a place where June quite enjoyed to a place now that traumatizes her, it was Lucas, she did not expect him here, nor did he expect her to answer the front door herself after what happened at school on the last day before summer break. They stood face to face, staring at each other, only their height separating them. The two stood like stone, not moving, yet breathing; who would be the one to break first?