A Burning Illusion

A Con Caught In A Tornado

Tiny droplets of water had fallen down my scalp and shoulders. I glanced down to see the top of my black shoes collect drops too. The ground becoming soft and mushy the longer I didn't move. Perfect. Strands of my hair stuck on my cheek and neck. Finally, I caught my breath and ran right into my tent for shelter. It would only be a matter of time before I was given the news that there would be no shows for today. If only I was an actual psychic, then I would have predicted the upcoming shit weather sooner. I gulped, setting my stuff down while the pitter patter of the rain finally started. Harder and faster. There was no denying that we had to cancel everything that day. 

Unless I was becoming cynical and presuming the worst already. That had to be it. So, I sat down on one of my chairs and waited. I was shuffling and testing out random tricks, trying to tied myself with my spare deck of cards. The rain continued much to my unhappiness. Then a pair of feet came halfway inside my tent, it was Rachel. 

                                                             "It ain't happening tonight, Oceane! Everyone's taking the day off. Stay inside and don't come out until you hear back from me or one of the girls" 

                                                               "Any update outside of town?" I questioned.

She shook her head, "Don't know yet! I checked last week and it was said we were supposed to have sunny skies all month! It's June for God's sake!" 

                                                               "Freak storm?" 

                                                              "Hope not! I gotta warn your assistant and the others, keep your ass inside! If you need me, I'll be setting up the trucks in case it gets worse!"  

She dashed out and I could have sworn I felt my heart skip a beat. There was no more point in staying in the tent. I huffed, quickly fastening the ropes and curtains until everything was sealed off. When I felt comfortable, I made a break back to my trailer barely seeing that everyone else was doing the same for the other tents and main stage. I locked the door and made sure every window was sealed shut. There was no guessing how long the rain would last at that point, the only thing us carnies could do was wait it out. And if the weather continued to get worse...no I stopped myself from thinking even more negatively. Take the opportunity to get some deserved sleep. Drift out of this reality-this rain until everything was in the clear. 

I didn't even bother to change out of my wrinkled blouse and trousers. My hair was a mess anyway and makeup was clearly out of the picture. The air then began to feel cold. So, I took off my shoes and fell on my bed. Ugh, it was going to be one of those days. I should have known...the birds that morning usually took off much later. If only I had a cigarette-something to take my edge off of the unknown. I softly chuckled at the irony of what was going on. For someone who hated the idea of change, the unexpected, of all things I could have ended up as how the hell did I end up as a magician? Perhaps in another life, I was married and enjoying my white picket fence yard at my daisy filled house with a scrappy dog or cat. Maybe with or without John or some guy I scammed doing a palm reading for. Who knows where I would have been if I hadn't chosen to continue being at the carnival. 

Another reason why I hated the unknown. I wouldn't know if there was another me that had a better purpose elsewhere. Another me who wasn't screwing with people to make a living. Another me who was...good. Shit, I really need a cigarette. I sighed knowing that I never had a chance to pick some up the other night. There was only one thing I could do. Wrap myself with my army green blanket then close my eyes until sleep came over me. 

                                                                                       _____

What felt like an entire year was actually a couple of hours. I woke up unexpectedly from a short nap. Groaning, I tried to lift my head to see any update out my window. We weren't completely out of the woods-numerous beadlets flung on the glass windows and every nook and cranny of the trailer.  I couldn't stand it for one second more, so I ended prying myself out of my bed and getting out my emergency whiskey from a hidden chest I kept under the vanity. It was probably going to be a stupid risk and the weather would clear soon. Rachel or one of the equipment assistants were going to knock on my door. But fuck it. I barely got any sleep and was not in the mood to wait to take the edge that was still attached inside of me.