yk before any of this know two things: im so just nervous for drumline auditions today and second i told jonathan not to talk to emilia while we were doing something together like band
okay so during morning band specifically during undertow i saw emilia and jonathan playing with each other, like they were poking each other and making each other laugh. and like its fine if someone else makes jokes with him and like pokes him cuz like that person is just friends with him and they dont have feelings for him. but when its emilia making him laugh and poking him and shit then i have a fucking problem with it, like emilia likes jonathan like of course im not gonna like it obviously not i feel like emilias trying to take him away i feel that sm i want it to stop im so fucking close to ending emilias so jonathan would have eyes for me or you know what he wants to cheat on me like that ill gladly cheat on him with my ex or even Maximo cuz honestly its unbelievable to me like me and rotc besti? i kept my space from him like sure we're friends but im not like breaking the friendship border with him instead i was keeping my space from him since i knew he liked me like what the hell jonathan didn't even keep space between him and emilia like to me it seems like he's telling emilia everything and talking to her more while im just a hopeless person who wait for him like a fucking pussy i should just cheat on him like how he did to me if that's what he wants and you know what ill even leave my bracelets at home by "accident" like how he does because honestly its not fucking fair to me anymore i quit honestly im fully fucking back to having a big ass crush on Maximo to the point where im a fucking stalker like im done
