Lonely Wishes

Chapter One

"Bellinger!" the teacher shouted. I shot up.

My head had been down on the desk. I usually daydreamed in classes which I wasn't interested in, meaning those which that I wasn't good at, such as math. I saw no purpose in pretending to listen, so I would just put my head down and lay on my desk. Of course it got me into trouble, but over the years most of my teachers just got used to me.

Mr. Ferrence was different. Eleventh grade was proving more difficult for me than previous years. Mr. Ferrence cared more than my other teachers about my participation in class.

"How many times do I have to call your name? Do you think that that's respectful, to ignore someone who speaks to you? Let alone a teacher?" he bellowed.

I just stared back at him, dazed. Truth is, I hadn't heard Mr. Ferrence calling my name. God knows I didn't.

"Don't worry, Mr. Ferrence, Corey was just spacing," a boy shout out from the back of the room, causing the classroom to burst out in laughter. It was Joey. Even Mr. Ferrence let a smile crack.

I felt myself turn red. I hated being the center of attention and I really didn't like the attention that I was getting now. But I felt thirty three pairs of eyes fixed on me. Why was no one coming to save me? I wished that I could just disappear.

After the laughing died down a bit, Mr. Ferrence turned back to me. "I don't know what's going to be with you, Bellinger."

A few girls in the left corner of the classroom giggled. I wondered if it had to do with me, but I was afraid to look.

Mr. Ferrence turned back to his desk to finish the lesson. I shot a look at the girls. They were trading notes between each other.

Just then, I felt something wet on my neck. I reached behind my neck to feel what it was, and found a spitball on my right side. I heard a snicker from the boys behind me, and I turned to see who it was.

"Don't worry, you're neck couldn't get grimier than it is now," I heard Dave hissing at me. "It's been a while since your last shower, eh?"

I felt myself turning colors again.

Just in time, the bell rang, and everyone ran out of the room. I decided that there would be no rush for me to push myself out of classroom. There was no one I was interested in meeting now. I decided to wait in my place until the room cleared up a little.

Most of the kids emptied out of the room pretty quickly. In a minute, no one was left besides me and a group of girls. They were crowding around Sharon.

Sharon was the popular girl the class. I thought that she was very pretty, but I knew that that was irrelevant. She was untouchable by me, the class nerd. I entertained no thought of her, besides jealously. I was jealous that she was so well liked, so popular, so not like me.

I watched the girls crowding around Sharon and giggling. I couldn't hear what they were talking about. But I was jealous that they were able to stand there and talk so freely, looking so happy.

I looked at Sharon. I wondered what was it about her that commanded such respect. Why did everyone like her so much? What was she doing that I wasn't? Or what was she not doing that I was.

Sharon looked up and her eyes met mine. She knitted her brows in anger.

"Pervert, Bellinger. Get your eyes off of us." Sharon called out, wrinkling her nose. The girls around her turned around to me. They started laughing.

For the third time in ten minutes, I felt my face heat up. I grabbed my books and started to get out of the room as fast as I could. "Go to your porn, Bellinger!" I heard one of the girls call out after me.