Bokuto x Y/n | Pinky promise

Pinky promise

You were fidgeting with your hands, focusing your eyes on the ground.
Your breath got uncontrolled and your heart clenched together, as you listened to your boyfriend Bokuto.

"Y/n were having an important match tomorrow, against Date Tech. Today at practice I jumped higher than Akaashi. Emo Boy can't even serve right hahaha!"
he rambled about his day while making himself a coffee as if his adrenalin wasn't enough.

"Koutarou." you wishpered, trying to push your tears away.

He immediately tensed up to the tone of your voice and turned around to face you.

"Y/n-chan? What's wrong?" he asked as he bent down to your hight and grabbed your hands.

You instantly pulled your hands away as if you got burned by the sensation of his skin.
Your eyes stayed at the ground. You couldn't commit looking into his eyes. You knew you would eventually break down in tears.

Shit, is this hard.

"Baby talk to me." Koutarou pleaded desperately after trying to reach you for the past 2 minutes you zoned out and started to reminiscing.

You took a deep breath to controll your voice. You didn't want to stutter or tremble, at worst cry.

You didn't know which words were right or if the right words were even existing in such a situation. How could you say it without breaking his heart.

"I want to break up Koutarou." you blurted out all in once without taking a breath between.

The silence was killing you. Bokuto didn't say a word and you hadn't got the guts to look into his face.

"What?" He wishpered, perplexed by your words.

You couldn't say it again. Not again. Not the words 'break up' again. You didn't want it to be true. All the confidence you've put into that sentence left your body.

"Don't you love me anymore?" He cought out. His voice was breaking, not to mention his heart that crumbled into thousends of pieces, which was noticeable in every note his voice created.

He sat down in front of you on the ground and stared at the ceilling trying to hold his eyes open, blinking the tears away.

"When did you fall out of love with me?" he wisphered barely for you to understand.

Your heart clenched as you heard his words. You loved him more than anything. You wanted to sit down on his lap, cup his cheeks and tell him more than hundert times that you loved him, till he kissed you to make you shut up like the usual.

You wanted to tell him, that you were never able to fall out of love with him, never able to love someone else.
Telling him that it would be okay,
- what kind of okay? Okay to break up with your boyfriend of years without giving him an explanation even though you still love him. -

Your world was falling apart but you had your reasons. To break up. To leave him.

You suddenly felt two fingers under chin, tilting your head upwords, to look into his eyes.

Sparks were sent through your whole body as you felt his touch. Your cheeks began to heat. But you still couldn't face him. You closed your eyes, two tears escaped from the outside of your eyes.

Even though Bokuto was childish in many situations, didn't take anything too serious and was wrapped around with his joyous energy, he had his own inner dominance that came through in specific situations.
The seriousness that was radiating around him was killing you internally.