Nandu's POV
I too feared,listening to her.
PastWith fear,my heart is beating rapidly, I turned around to see. Someone was stood in dark stepping forward and stood below the street lamp. Even to shout 'HELP',my words were struck in my throat, no person is around me.
I held my thick bangle in my palm,to fight if he approaches me. That's when he approached made me stunned. Please stop right there.. I said trembling with fear.
But when he raised his head , I was stunned to see him releasing my bangle which fell on the ground creating a small sound to which I felt relief.My eyes got teary don't know whether it was happy tears seing him or sad tears due to missing him.Even though I fought myself not to go near him.
He was pleading with his eyes was I felt. When he called me Roopa after these days. I was like ,I reborn. I tried to be angry failed miserably.He came forward and stood beside him.
I retained my consciousness not to touch him or hug him.when he again called me Roopa,throughing away all my thoughts. I hugged him and started crying saying ," I missed you". But he didn't hug me back. He never touched me. He never glanced at me in a wrong way like other boys or so made me more attracted to him.
But when he patted me on my back saying ," I too miss you .......as.s..a..ffriend" made me stunned and moved back . My anger return back when I listened to him.Why do you even have to say in particular. Even after all these, This was the first time I felt Why don't he Love me even with pity?!.I never wanted anyone to feel pity towards me.
I never felt anything immense in my whole life. Usually Hate and Love are two strong words ,that doesn't go with each other. But with him, I hate him for not reciprocating my Love and I just Love him.
I just moved far from him started running away. Even though,he pleaded me to listen to him.while running, I felt there is no point of listening to him.I was letting him hurt me repeatedly in the hope of his love.
I ran fast till hostel gate and slow down seeing people present. I rub off my tears and started to move to my room avoiding everyone's gaze. There were only a handful of people whom I used to talk ,but in them to samatha was the only one I lean on to.
Seeing my dried tears samatha asked me what happened. I said what happened. She hugged me till my tears subsided.Next day , I didn't attended to any classes. Even I didn't went out of my room.It's been three days of me not going out of my room , but this was the first I felt lost and rejected unlike the any other time. Then there was only anger then. But now it was only pain, even after I felt succeeded in my studies. I felt lost in my personal life. I never loved anyone in my whole life other than my parents made me miserable.
Later I have to attended classes as my professor asked me for details of the lab work.I went to class and ignored everyone and just sat there not interested in studies even.As they were not more friends made the situation simple for me to avoid them, but not their mouths avoided the situation. Most of them know the situation of me and started gossiping behind me. I felt I'm the only one against the world. Later I started involving in studies.In few days I get back into studies again avoiding everything.
But again Fresher's day came made less of classes and more of group meetings. Anand being cultural head from past year made it difficult to avoid him ,even how hard I try.Unlike before, he never glanced at me made me more miserable . Girls and boys always around him made me jealous. I started again isolating myself seeing Shreya with him.
Everytime I see both of them, my heart pinches.I ignored them completely is what I thought, but no, I was always have an eye on them.You know how silly I turned into one day , I poured coconut oil for her to fell. That's what happened, but instead of her he fell down. When everyone was helping him, he glanced at me with a knowing smile made me guilty.
But more of guilty , I'm angry on him for rescuing her. I glared at him but he smiled sadly. I don't know what was going on in his mind.He went to nurse room with shreya and Anil( Anand's best friend), where they said it's nothing to worry but will be gone after resting for a while applying the cream.
He slept after taking tablets made them leave for him to rest. I entered and sat beside him, I just stared at him for few minutes as a tear rolled down my cheek why have he put him before Shreya. Why don't he Love me as much as he Love Shreya!.
He got up staring at me, no words were exchanged as I know he never talk to me. But unlike I thought he said ,' SORRY '. I asked ,"for what !?"trying to act anger.
"For making you go through so much pain," he said.
"There is no meaning to say sorry if you can't love me back",I said clearly. There is nothing to hide anymore as everyone is aware of my feelings. He huffed and said that he loves me at first made me a little hope raise in my heart but is crushed down with his later words,as a friend.
I abruptly got up listening to him." Please listen to me POOJA, At first I befriended you for Shreya but knowing you. I never wanted to loose your friendship."
I want to shout at him," To stop friend zone me". But I just stared him.
"Those were the best days for me with you. But then you came to know about Shreya and me. Everything changed. You never smile made me more guilty. The guilty is killing me. Why don't you forgive me !? Please....Roopa try to understand. " he said pleadingly made me teary.
Eventhough my brain taunted ," What about you and your feelings. But my heart questioned that," Do you want him to feel more miserable". Then it was 'No'. I can't see him in pain. So I smiled sadly.
I don't usually have friends with boys even though with girls to it was less. But with Boys," It was complete 'NO'. He first approached me to become friends. But I declined him ,even though I admire him but becoming friends is different. So he asked No..No...He pleaded me to spend some time with him. That's how we went to outing at first.He placed his hands on me asking,"Are we friends!?" Just like the first time he asked me after outing. I really felt emotional and nodded my head saying 'Yes'. He smiled seeing me happily."My compromise is all the worth of his one smile" , my heart said happily.
My brain questioned, " What about your feelings!?". For that I don't know.
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Nandu's PovEventhough It was lovely to hear their lovestory but she was not coming to the point. And she was reliving those moments making her emotional. How many times should I have to say to live in present not in past. Pushing my anger aside I asked"Mom... ! Why did Dad hate you. You both become good friends again.Then how come he hate you.
That's when she asked," If we're just friends, then how come you both came to this world. It's just the beginning of our story.
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