Mistakes of a Perfectionist

Mistake One - Sitting Next to an Empty Chair

"Excuse me, sorry."

"My bad, I'm so sorry."

"Coming through, sorry."

Cameron's shoes squeaked loudly as he rushed through the hallways of Intesab Preparatory School, darting through gaggles of students, and clutching his bookbag tightly. He didn't panic though, this was routine and was to be expected. He was in 12th-grade Spanish, located all the way in the C Wing, and all of his eleventh-grade classes were located back in the A-Wing. A challenge, but a common one for Cameron.

The only stressful part was the people he had to quickly brush off to make it on time to his next class, not that he was upset to have many friends; he felt like an ass for delivering only quick greetings and friendly smiles before quickly pushing past them. And while on the surface they appeared to not care or notice, he knew deep down they thought he was rude for doing so.

A consistent problem. He dreaded the passing period between 2nd and 3rd for this very reason. The pounding in his head only got worse because of it. Logically, he knew it might just all be in his head, so it felt silly to even think about complaining about it.

So he didn't.

Despite this, he executed his assholery in a timely manner and ended up in maths at exactly 9:43, two minutes early. He quickly set down his bag at his desk and greeted his teacher, Ms. Huan, asking her kindly about her weekend and making pleasant small talk. He then greeted some of his friends on his way back to his seat as class started, and sat down at his empty table.

Checking his phone, it was now 9:46. Ms. Huan began giving directions for the classwork they would be doing today, and Cameron placed his bag on the seat next to him for easy access to his supplies. This was a pro to sitting alone, and while he sometimes worried his classmates would judge him and think he was some anti-social loser, he did appreciate the extra space provided in his isolation.

At 9:56, Cameron had already become engrossed in his work. It was a simple online worksheet, and he worked quickly through each problem. Math certainly was not his favorite or best-performing class, and he definitely did not perform well without exhausting the school's tutoring resources. Thankfully, he remained at a satisfactory 98% throughout this semester because of these services; though he hopes to bump that up to a crisp 100% or higher before the end of the year.

He was broken from his focus when he pulled out his phone to set a reminder to set a meeting with his tutor to check his work, allowing him to notice the class's attention had been directed towards the opening of the class's door. A short, thin boy wearing a dark oversized hoodie noisily stumbled in with his backpack slung over his shoulder.

Cameron checked the time, 10:03, a full eighteen minutes after class had started. While Cameron couldn't fathom being that late casually, it would be understandable if the boy had a doctor's or dentist's appointment or a family emergency; and he surely would have a pass for being so late.

"It's good to see you finally show up, Luz! " Ms. Huan proclaimed loudly from her desk. She often enjoyed joking with her students so Cameron expected this from her.

The boy, Luz, grinned. "Guess I must have lost my hold on time - I'm a master of temporal displacement."

"May I see your pass?"

Luz shifted slightly before his confident demeanor returned.

"Here you are, Ms. Huan." He said calmly as he walked over to her desk and handed her a small paper slip.

Cameron watched as Ms. Huan took the paper and a slight look of annoyance spread across her face. "Alright then, since it is your first day showing up to my class all semester, you should sit by Cameron; there, in the back."

Cameron was startled at the sound of his name and quickly moved his bag from the seat next to him, offering up a friendly smile to Luz as he walked back to his table and took a seat. While tempted to try and start a conversation to disperse the awkward atmosphere, Luz said nothing to him and so he said nothing in return; attempting to place his attention back to the work he was so focused on previously.

But Cameron knew himself to be the observant type, and while he tried to focus, he ended up unconsciously taking in more of the boy. Luz's long brown hair was a mess, but not in an ugly way or anything (at least not in any way Cameron would consider ugly), but more in a messy casual manner. His clothes were similar, baggy but not ugly and they certainly weren't dirty; and Cameron could just barely make out the white school uniform hidden underneath his sweatshirt.

Of course, this wasn't the first time Cameron had seen Luz. They shared a couple of classes together last year, and he saw him frequently in the halls or in lines during lunch. He just never paid that much attention to him.

But he paid attention now, admittedly more than some might consider normal, but Luz was intriguing in the ways he acted. Cameron first noticed how Luz pulled out his school computer from his crumpled backpack, opened it, and logged in only to pull out a notebook and lay it on the keyboard. Cameron glanced at the pages as Luz flipped through it, realizing it was less of a notebook and more of a sketchbook disguised as a normal school notebook; well, sketchbook might be too specific a term as he glimpsed snippets of messy writing and book pages within.

Luz then turned to his backpack once more, digging around in it for a longer period of time than he did before. He then jolted upward and turned to Cameron. "Cameron, right?"

Startled, Cameron flinched but quickly responded in a friendly manner, "Yep! Luz, right?"

Luz smiled. Cameron could tell it was a fake smile but he appreciated the attempt at kindness Luz offered up. "Yeah, I'm really sorry about this, but can I borrow a pencil? I can't find one in my bag."

"Yeah, of course." Cameron leaned over and swiftly pulled out his pencil bag and handed a new mechanical pencil over to Luz.

"Thanks, I'll make sure to return it," Luz said, taking the pencil and pushing out some of its lead.

"No need, I have plenty." Cameron smiled, hoping that this act of kindness would help the awkwardness at the table subside for now.

"You sure?"

"Yes."

"Thank you, I appreciate it."

Cameron then turned back to his computer, cringing to himself about how awkward he is. He did wonder who wouldn't bring a pencil to school, but then felt shame for assuming that Luz even had the ability to buy pencils.

What he knew for sure though, was that Luz was talented. In his glimpses at Luz's notebook, he could see the amount of effort and skill he had in art; as well as how even with the limited resources the time in maths provided, Luz still managed to produce a pleasant series of doodles within the pages of his notebook. And while Cameron himself slightly judged the lack of importance Luz put on his studies, he couldn't help but respect the clear ability Luz possessed.

Regardless, Luz served as an unfortunate distraction. Cameron checked the time, 11:13. He had gotten barely any work done on the worksheet. Thankfully, he could get it done during his tutoring session if he needed to, although he hated having to use the school's resources like that.

Inwardly cursing himself, he hastily packed his bag and said goodbye to Ms. Huan, and left the classroom. Thoughts of Luz faded as he walked further from the classroom, having been overwhelmed with thoughts of problems and responsibilities.

By the time he arrived at his next class, Luz had faded entirely.