Will You Love Me When I'm Gone?

Chapter One: The Beginning

A special thanks to Literacy101, you're a wonderful writer love.

My name is John. John Albenister. And I'm currently signing up for my college (in complete fear of my mother's wrath) whilst canceling out my carb with a protein, (eating a pear which is a carb, and a drinking a protein shake, the protein).

Let me teach you a thing:

My mother is both terrifying (to the point where you could piss yourself) and incredibly graceful (like a fucking fairy). She is not of this world it seems.

I spent the seventeenth day of freedom after my high school graduation in three parts. An abrupt awakening, enlightenment, and giving into my mother's wrath.

PART ONE

I had an abrupt awakening. I was just calmly sleeping when I had a dream, no a divine intervention. It started with me falling off my bed at two in the morning, knocking my water glass off the night stand in the process and covering myself with water. I yelped at my unintentional ALS ice bucket challenge, and stood. I walked over to my white board and in deep purple wrote six words: "I want to go to college". I crawled back into bed. Now apparently that wasn't a dream. When I awoke, it was slow. I felt hot, bothered and wet, (not in the most pleasurable way) and I slowly cracked my eyes open to see the source of my discomfort, a tipped over water glass, and a cryptic message on my whiteboard that said:

"I want to go to college"

Now I had never thought of going to college, nor do I wish to go to college. Mainly because of this:

(Small fortune for application to college)

+

(Small fortune for college tuition • X)

+

(Small fortune for books)

+

(Small fortune for on campus living)

+

(Small fortune for pricy food)

=

Large fortune of money that I don't even fracking have god dammit.

And based upon the fact that I don't have the money for college, I cannot go to college. I like the idea of college, going to parties and getting drunk and devirginizing some random girl and forgetting about her the next morning sounds nice. And pranking teachers and testing drugs. College is the place where adults live remorselessly and find themselves; meanwhile they're getting diplomas to live their dreams. But I don't have a dream. If I went to college it'd be to go to college for the experience.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not some geek who lives in his parent's basement watching porn all the time. No, I live in the loft above the garage that I rent. And I play COD, Modern Warfare, LOL, etc. And I don't work at a comic book store, I work at the Barnes and Noble book store near the Westfield mall on 60. Not a geek, a nerd. There's a wide, deep crevice between the two.

But let's return to the cryptic message.

So there is this creepy as fuck message on my whiteboard.

But the creepiest thing of all is that it won't go away. It's as if the entire message is written with permanent marker. Whatever. I go downstairs to greet my dog Balgarath and surprisingly my mother on my couch. "Mom, what are you doing here? I mean i live like next slash above you but like, this is my place." I lean on the kitchen counter looking over at her. "Well I came to tell you that one, you're almost late for work, and two, I told you to start applying for college. I'm making you go now." I stare over at her, unblinking. "Mother no." She laughs halfheartedly, and then broke into sobs. "But my dream was for you to go to college." ~sniffle~ "You're just digging yourself into a pit you can't climb out of. I love you too much to let you do this to yourself" She's actually crying. Shit. "Mom they will not want me anyways, but whatever. Ill apply if it makes you happy." Her head pops up from her hands and she's all happy and smiling and she says "Great, if you don't apply you're getting kicked out on Saturday. You have four days." Then she practically skips out of my loft like a fucking fairy. Mom, you piss me off.

PART TWO

In the two hours I've been at work, I've had the strangest desire to go home and apply for college. It isn't my mom forcing me anymore, it's that I want to go. Maybe it's the thought of actually being an adult now or the feeling of freedom. Whatever it is, I love it. And so I think of it, and the minutes turn to hours. Soon, Molly tells me it's time to lock up. I look over at her from across the counter, she's shy today. "Hey Molls what's wrong? You not up for tonight?" She looks up at me with those adorable little blue orbs hidden behind her silver spindly frames. The blue can easily be compared with Roman beaches in the summer, it's so easy to lose oneself in their beauty.

I go out from behind the counter, pick her up and place her on it. She smiles as I kiss her. "John we have to be fast okay?" I put one hand on her neck and start nipping the other side. Her breath catches only for a second. "Okay." I pick her up bridal style and take her into the break room, and sit on a couch so that she's straddling me. I kiss her ferociously. She starts pulling at my shirt, so I rip it off, and go back to kissing her. She starts grinding her hips, her shorts rubbing against my jeans. I pick her up, turn, and gently place her on the couch before turning my attention to taking off my jeans. It takes me a few moments to fumble with the clasp and when I look up her shirt is gone. Damn shes so beautiful. Why does she have to be so beautiful? I start kissing her again, roughly and full of passion. She bites my lower lip, and I'm literally losing it. I stop kissing her to whisper in her ear that I love her, and that she's so beautiful. "I love you too, John." her voice is so sweet, like honey.

Her phone goes and we have to forcefully pull ourselves away, each silently wishing that whoever was on the other end would hang up. She slowly gets up to grab it and answers. I hear some garbled words from a masculine voice and she physically gulps before answering. "Yeah, babe, I'm fine. No, I am on my way home now, there's just traffic. No, I'm not with someone." silence, she stands and walks away from me and I can see the scars on her back, three, where the bottle cut. "I can't answer the phone while driving, please stop yelling. Bye. Love you." She taps the screen, and lets it clatter to the floor, screaming. She buries her face in her hands and starts sobbing. I hold her while she cries. "I have to go home, my tyrant is being bossy again." She grabs her shirt. "You could just break up with him, you know, if he's being like that." She immediately stops moving and stares at me, her eyes huge and she begins to shake slightly like a scared puppy. "No, I can't. Not after that." I go over to her and kiss her again. "I love you." she whispers faintly. "I love you too, Molly." And then she's gone, like mist in air.

The drive home is rushed, and full of traffic violations. My mother would be ashamed, but she'd be more ashamed if she knew about Molly. Hell, I'm ashamed. But Brice won't let her go, and she can't leave. I could feel my anger rising thinking of what he's done, what he might do tonight, and how she won't let me kill him for it. I push the gas trying to relieve my anger, and speed home to apply for college.

PART THREE

(By the way, the story has officially caught up and we are at the beginning, back flash is over.) I continue applying for college, having already applied for USF and FSU, going on to Tampa Bay University and Flagler. This takes forever, and when I'm done the sun is setting. I hear a faint ringing from the living room, so I jump up to answer it, hoping its Molly. When I pick up the device, I see that it's actually my mother. "Hi mom." "Have you applied? To how many? What colleges have you thought of? Did you sign up for scholarships?" She talks so fast I almost miss what she's saying. "Yeah, four, USF, FSU, Bay and Flagler, and not yet." She's quiet, for two seconds. "I want to be the first to know when you're accepted. Sign up for scholarships. There's a stir fry for dinner with lemon meringue pie for dessert. Bye, see you in an hour." The line clicks, and I shuffle into the office to finish my food and play some rusk games in Minecraft, the PC version. I get into the game, and immediately I am picked off by a pro who I've seen before, MagikarpCruiser and no matter what I always lose to him. I wait it out for the next round, fiddling around with things on my desk. Balgarath comes trotting in, and begs to be petted. I log off of the game, giving up because there literally is NO point if Magikarp is in the game. I flop onto my bed, and my dog hops up onto it as well, and I fall asleep.