𝐖𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐍𝐔𝐌𝐁𝐄𝐑 - 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝗹𝗲𝗰𝗹𝗲𝗿𝗰

r e a l l i f e

⚠️ this chapter is really really shit but im tired

WRONG NUMBER.

"HI LIN!" charles grin was evident in his voice as linnea skarsgård finally answered the dreaded phone call.

"hey charles, how are you?" linnea replied with a forced smile.

she did not want to be doing this.
she now had to explain the meanings of all the songs in her album to charles.

and to make matters better, the first one is about how in love with him she is.

"so... the lyrics." charles promted, hoping to finally be able to understand the complexity of linneas album.

he truly thought she was one the most talented people he'd ever met. he knew that each song probably has 100 different meanings to the lyrics, and he just wants to understand them.

"yeah..." linnea trailed, trying to prolong the awkward experience as much as possible.

"well..." she started, deciding to just get on with it as it was inevitably going to happen at some point. "okay so if you hadn't figured it out by now, its about you. when you... when the rumors came about i didnt handle it very well. i kinda started to become... depressed again? i dont really know what i can call it. but the start of the songs about that. 'last night, i spiralled alone in the kitchen' for example.

then, it moves on to how you betrayed me. and yeah i know that you've explained it all now, but obviously i didnt know it then. 'thinking of you without any forgiveness.' is because well... i didnt want to forgive you. pretty obvious." the girl was flicking through a notebook that charles could only guess was filled with lyrics while he listened intently.

" um.. then the chorus 'i know that i should hate you.' that's because i should've hated you, i did hate you, but i couldn't continue to hate you. i- nevermind its stupid." linnea shook her head and charles was about to intervene to tell her it wasnt stupid, but she'd moved on already.

" 'pulled the knife out my back it was right where you left it.' is a metaphor that you stabbed me in the back. then 'i just drank something strong to try to forget.' is pretty self explanatory. then the rest of the song is pretty much the same lyrics or similar." she was missing out a big line, and they both knew it.

charles knew that it was now or never to find out what she had meant in her song. "hey- what about the line 'i'd kill you if i loved you less hard.'?"

linnea froze. she looked up from her notebook that she'd been flicking through to find the lyrics to her next song. "i- uh... well- its pretty obvious, is it not?"

charles gulped. "i mean i guess... but- i- you love me?" he blurted out.

"i mean... i- i guess. its alright if you dont feel the same way and- anyways moving on to 'this is what the drugs are for.' " linnea rushed, not wanting to talk about it anymore.

charles sighed. why did she never give him a chance to speak?

because he did love her. he loved her more than he'd ever loved someone before. and honestly, he didnt think he'd ever stop loving her.

linnea talked through the lyrics of 'this is what the drugs are for', explaining how it was about her childhood. about how she'd lost it so quickly and she'd do anything to get it back.

charles was quite surprised, he'd expected it to be about a person. he couldn't help but marvel at how complex a simple song could be, and how her brain could come up with such amazing analogies.

she then explained how 'borderline' and 'nowhere fast' where both about her younger self when she was suicidal.

"and hostage is about... you."

charles felt his heart stop. he thought back to the lyrics of hostage, and he couldn't quite believe she'd writen such an amazing song about him.

'i wanna be alone, alone with you does that make sense?'

"charles... you just bring me a sense of.... comfort. sometimes i havent felt with a guy for a long long time. even when me and matt first started dating, it never felt like this."

'this feels right so stay a sec. yeah you feel right so stay a sec.'

"i- you're an amazing person, charles. i know that there was the whole georgia shenanigan, but i do believe you. well- i want to believe you. im not quite there yet. and everyone has flaws, maybe yours is that you dont react fast enough." linnea joked, earning a chuckle from charles.

'golds fake and real love hurts, but nothing hurts when im alone. when you're with me and we're alone.'

"im so so sorry for that linnea. i swear i will do anything to make it up to you. and im not going to stop apologising till the day i die. anyways, what about 'listen before i go'?"

linnea let out a deep breath. "its about my attempts. i- i dont really wanna talk about that one. im sorry." her voice cracked and i few tears rolled down her cheek.

"oh- its fine! i get it. you dont have to apologise." charles' heart broke and a few tears slipped out his own eyes as well.

"july and enough for you are about matt. julys more based towards the end of our relationship when he was alcoholic and would mentally abuse me. 'cause you remind me everyday im not enough but i still stay.' he used to always bring me down and tell me how worthless i was, but i was too blind with love to leave him. 'enough for you.' is more towards the middle of our relationship. i always put in so much effort into the relationship. i loved him so much, but like the song says, i guess i was never enough." linnea shrugged, tears rolling down her cheeks.

"i wish i was with you right now." charles whispered through the screen.

"me too." linnea smiled sadly in between cries. no matter what he'd done, she would always adore the comfort and peace he brought to the girl.

"and... would've, could've, should've. that songs about... um... i haven't told you this... actually... maybe its better if i told you in person." linnea sighed after stuttering on her words for a moment.

"... you sure?"

she nodded. "yeah. i mean... its not that difficult to work out. but its really personal so i would prefer to tell you in person."

charles nodded in understanding. "yeah of course. im gonna go to bed now... but we can stay on the phone if you want?"

linnea nodded quickly, wanting as much comfort from him as possible. "yes please. night charles."

"night, linnea."

and so the two slept together but apart, both soaking up as much of each others solace as possible while over the phone.

💌

i literally hate this ew??

but im literally so fucking tired rn so i might re write this

anyways im so fucking mad ab the gp like ferrari go fuck urselves 🖕🖕

literally sobbed for charles, carlos, lando and oscar

and holy shit there was this MASSIVE spider in my room like bro i dont live in australia tf u doin here

love,
el 🤍