BFF's 4 Lyf (coming soon)

chapter two: bob the hobo

Bob the Hobo wouldn't rent them his shopping cart that was filled to the brim with miscellaneous items. He just wouldn't. He would gladly take the KFC Cris and Marc offered him though.

It was Friday and instead of going back home after school to do their homework like good children, they decided that today was a good day to put their plan into action. That plan would be putting Diesel in a shopping cart. But with Bob being uncooperative, it was becoming unlikely that that plan will be happening anytime soon.

Right after school Cris and Marc went over to KFC to buy a bucket of fried chicken for Bob, in exchange Bob would lend his shopping cart to them for a day. They thought that the KFC would definitely make Bob agree because who doesn't like KFC? No one, that's who- except if you're allergic to chicken that is. Hell, Ruth has a mild allergy to chickens but she could still eat her share of KFC without second guessing. So when they went over to Bob at the bench he slept and hang around at at the bus stop carrying the bucket of fried chicken, they were in high spirits because there was no way this plan could fail.

But it did, because according to Bob he ain't gonna take off all his shit in his cart just so them kids could put a damn dog in it and parade it 'round like some rich, fake-ass crazy Botox Beverly Hills lady and then put his shit back in the cart before the fucking goddamn sons of bitches steal his shit. Then Marc asked him if he was sure, he still said no but he wouldn't mind taking the bucket of fried chicken off their hands.

So Cris looked down at the bucket of fried chicken she was carrying, then at Marc, after a moment she gave it to Bob because they did bought it for him in the first place. Bob took it without hesitation and gave them his signature yellow teeth smile. Cris asked Bob if she could have a piece of chicken. Bob then gave them both a leg then the two proceeded to sit beside Bob on the bench, both already giving up the idea of ever putting Diesel in a shopping cart.

"You know, Mister Yuri has been fucking Mrs. Cramer," Bob said as he chew, turning around to point his chicken that he already had bitten on at the Greek restaurant. Bob likes to call Mister Yuri Mister Yuri instead of just Yuri or whatever because he somehow still respected the guy even though his a married man who likes to fuck around like a dog in heat. Both Cris and Marc fail to see how Bob could still respect Mister Yuri, but if Bob did respect Yuri he has a funny way of showing it. Because if he did respect Mister Yuri he wouldn't be gossiping about him.

"Mrs. Cramer? Isn't she still married?" Marc said, taking a bite from his chicken as he looked at the Greek restaurant.

"That's right, that's why I said missus. Why would I use missus if she ain't married?" Bob said looking at Marc like he was dumb. "Now," Bob continued, "last night, probably at two a.m., Mrs. Cramer went over there and used the backdoor. Now, let me tell you both, you ain't got no business going to a restaurant at two a.m. unless you own it or work in it or you looking to be fucked, and I'm pretty sure she was looking to be fucked. Because an hour later she went out, hair's a mess and looking all ashamed and then a few minutes later Mr. Yuri went out of his restaurant looking satisfied like an obese child finishing his dessert." Bob then shook his head and took another bite.

"Maybe she just went over to talk to him," Cris said, even though she herself was aware that this was very unlikely.

"And she couldn't wait to tell him until the store was open? No Cris. If they were talking they be talking while they were fucking," Bob chuckled, finishing off his chicken.

A silence then passed on them and only the sound of their chewing was heard from the three of them. Then after Bob finished his second chicken he stood up to throw away the bones to the nearby trash can.

"What..." Bob trailed when something on the floor caught his eye. He bended his knees to picked it up. "Would you look at that." Bob then raised his hand to show them a crumpled 20. Grinning and gripping his twenty, he walked back towards the two. "First a bucket of KFC and now a 20. It seems to be my lucky day!"