The Big Book of Random Crap

My OC's Incorrect Quotes

IF YOU ARE A CHILD DO NOT READ! MULTIPLE S*X JOKES AND LANGUAGE. ALSO, ALL THE CHARACTERS ARE FROM MY BOOK HOME LIFE.

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TW: Swearing, s*x jokes, horny demons, and spoilers for my book. Kind of.

If you're still reading, enjoy!

Luci, texting Jai: Any plans for tonight?
Jai: No.
Luci: Loser.

Luci: Think you can answer some questions without the usual level of sarcasm?
Jai: If you can ask the questions without the usual level of stupid.

Luci: Jai is playing hard to get.
Luci: Little do they know, I'm a master at playing hard to get rid of.

*Jai and Luci playing minecraft*
Jai: Oh no, oh no, oh no-
Luci: What's wrong?
Jai: I did a thing.
Luci: You regret the thing you dID-
Jai: *screams*
Luci: What the fuck did you do- *sees mass of aggravated Piglin* Damn it-
Jai: *screams again*

Jai: I am the left brain, I am the left brain. "I work really hard until my inevitable death" brain. You've got a job to do, you better do it right and the right way is with the left brain's might.
Luci: I LIKE OREOS AND PUSSY-

Jai, texting Luci: I'm a theif.
Luci: Thief.
Jai: Theif.
Luci: I before E except after C.
Jai: Thceif.
Luci: NO.

Noah, texting Jackie: Text me when you're home safely.
Jackie: I'm home dangerously.
Noah: Stop it.
Jackie: I'm home lethally.

Jackie: Valentine's day is just a consumerist holiday that holds no real value other than drive people insane buying heart shaped chocolates for their significant others and pos-
Noah: I wrote you a poem.
Jackie, already crying: You did?

Noah: Do you want to know your gay name?
Jackie: My... my gay name?
Noah: Yeah, it's your first name-
Jackie: Haha. Very funny Noah-
Noah: *gets down on one knee* And my last name.
Jackie: Oh- oh my god.

Jackie: Are you coming to bed?
Noah: I can't. This is important.
Jackie: What?
Noah: Someone is wrong on the internet.

Jai: Alright, who's hogging the Netflix account? I've been locked out all week!
Luci: Sucks to suck! I'm already on the 8th season of Friends!
Jackie: Not me.
Jai: Don't lie. I know it's not Willow or Shea.
Jackie: It's not me, really!
Jai: ...
Jackie: ...But it might be Noah...
Jai: You gave Noah access to our Netflix account!?!?
Jackie: He wanted to watch Orange is the New Black!
Jai: I'm going to kill you.